Paramount: A Lot Divided, Part II: Running CBS Out Of The Gym
This morning's post about the rapidly widening gap on the Paramount lot between New Viacom employees and the red-headed stepchildren of CBS Corp. prompted several e-mails from the frontline of the escalating class war. A couple of people noted The Christmas iPod Incident, in which those who landed on the wrong side of the corporate split (CBS) watched as their Paramount/NV officemates played with their shiny new toys while they got this seemed to foreshadow future problems. The divisive fun's not over yet, however, as a lucky NV'er details another slight:
Though I am privileged to be on the Viacom side, I have many friends in the Untouchable Caste - I mean CBS. Notice posted in the on-lot gym this week says Paramount Peeps will now pay $30 a month for gym membership while CBS types must pay $65. A note on the suggestions board reading: "If you want us to pay more, get us new equipment" was erased today. I'm having 2nd grade flashbacks to when I ate chocolates in front of my sister to make her jealous because she didn't have any. Maybe they are hoping all Untouchables will just quit. Actually, I think it may be a plot by NBC to just kill - KILL - CBS so Earl and Four Kings look better.
The increase in gym fees might be the most diabolically brilliant NV ploy of them all. By raising the rates to a level that almost no CBS employee will be willing to pay, the Freston faction hopes to physically weaken the Moonvesians to the point of muscle atrophy, thus making them that much easier to eventually bully off the lot. Well played. And if the fitness-related assault doesn't break their spirits, the planned scheme to "transfer" CBS employees' toddlers from the day care facilities to the adoption black market certainly will.