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It's Friday, playas, meaning it's time for our favorite game, wherein we sort through the galleries of fucked-up hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don't have to. Then we bring you our 10 favorites, freshly-cooked and ready for consumption. After the jump, let the verbal stylings of Joey Arak guide you through the heart of darkness.

We're sorry to report that Misshapes did not publish photos this week, which leaves us to wonder: if there's a hipster dance party, but there are no debauched photos on the Internet, did it really exist? While the sages ponder this, let us tell you that the Misshapes disappointment was more than made up for when we discovered that Last Night's Party now has a blog. If you're as excited as us by this development, then you probably need to change your undies. Let's peek in for a sampling, shall we?

Bronques: Thomas, can I get a quick one?
Thomas: Oh?
Bronques: Right over here.
Thomas: Smile or no smile?
Bronques: Give me "door bitch".
Thomas: Okay. (click)
Bronques: That's it! If you're happy, then I am...
Thomas: (looking at the picture) Hey that works. Look, I almost don't look like I have a double chin. (laughter)

Life is...good. In fact, if LNP keeps this thing updated, we're going to highlight our favorite blog excerpt every Friday in this space, a nice little bonus to the Don'ts. And Misshapes will be back with a vengeance next week, we assume, because The Cobrasnake will be there for extra-detailed coverage. Everybody wins! Now on with the list...

10) Last Night's Party. Paparazzi Wednesday photo #0303: Ever since Adrien Brody took home that Oscar and mentioned something about "making beats with Puffy," he kind of dropped off, no? Sure there was that ding-up on Delancey Street, but mainly he's been out of the public spotlight, doing God knows what. Well we tracked him down, and it turns out he's just been beard-deep in cleavage. Well, three-fourths beard-deep in cleavage, anyway. Isn't that cute? The little guy's trying to grow some scruff.

9) Last Night's Party. Paparazzi Wednesday photo #0555: It's awesome to know that the racial strife that plagues so much of this countrynay, this worldjust doesn't apply in New York. It makes us feel all warm and fuzzy on the insides. Where else but in New York could an odd couple like Lil' Jon and a Special Olympics fourth-place finisher hang out, knock back a few drinks and just say "Fuck the world?" We're getting teary-eyed just thinking about how touching this is.

8) Ambrel. Mick Rock "Rock 'n Roll Eye" Party photo #0287: This dude's boobs are so big that his boob is growing boobs. And we don't care what you say, that's a fucking dude.

7) Last Night's Party. NSFW Tuesday photo #6: You ever find yourself at one of these events (admit it), looking around at all these "fabulous" people and just wondering, "Is this a youth thing? What will these people be like when they're moms? They'll drop the charade when they clear 30 or 35, right?" Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ... think again, Aristotle. Momma's just getting started and she's hungry for Stroke cock.

6) The Cobrasnake. Yellow Pages photo #4775: This is some sort of larger commentary on hipster male maturity and sexuality, right? Like, when you strip it all away, they're all just little boys with David Cross fetishes? No doify. Did Cornell really need to commission a study on that? Any chick south of Houston north of Delancey east of Allen west of Clinton could have clued you in on the cheap.

5) The Cobrasnake. Squid Pro Quo photo #8369: In Florence I was a God, burning up the Flamenco floors and sweating passion from every orifice. Women wanted me (but couldn't have me), men envied me (alas, it could not be!). Betrayed and shamed by a novio paid off by the wreteched prensa rosa, I packed up all my belongings and bought a one-way steamboat ticket to New York. Now all I have are my memories...my dreams...my fantasias. Ay mami! Mi corazon roto! I cannot even gain the strength to look another in the eye. Perdon, I lost myself for a second. May I offer you a man-bag?

4) Last Night's Party. Paparazzi Wednesday photo #0310: Oh, God. If only! Hey, if Jesus could turn water to wine, surely he could turn jelly bracelets and pleather to cold steel. Oh, and by the way, this is from a completely different party and night. And this is from a completely different photographer. Quit stalling and fucking do it!

3) The Cobrasnake. Squid Pro Quo photo #8595: A lot of people think sites like The Cobrasnake and Last Night's Party are interchangable. They don't see annoying LA hipsters or annoying NYC hipsters; they just see annoying hipsters. But, um, there's definitely a difference. See if you can spot the distinctly LA aspect of this douchetwat. It's subtle, but, uh, it's there. Trust us. Um, yeah.

2) Ambrel. Larry Tee's Nouveau! Party photo #0455: Only at some lame intentionally-over-the-top New York hipster fuckfest could some retard dress up as Black Hippie Jesus and not get the shit kicked out of him by the actual black person standing right behind him. Tourism Council: feel free to use that.

1) Last Night's Party. NSFW Tuesday photo #0110: "I AM GOLGARON, MASTER OF PAIN AND PLEASURE, PLEASURE AND PAIN! FOLLOW ME INTO MY DUNGEON OF DARK DELIGHTS! IT IS OK TO BE AFRAID! SUBMIT TO THE WILLS OF MY SERVANTS, FORTURON AND LADY DESPAIR, AND WE WILL LEAD YOU ON A TWISTED JOURNEY INTO THE HEART OF DARKNESS! PBR'S ARE TWO-FOR-ONE FROM 10-11!