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• Actor Leonardo DiCaprio and supermodel Giselle Bundchen have reportedly ended their relationship — for real this time, and perhaps because of a third party. If this is the case, let's hope Leo cleans himself up a bit before heading back into the singles scene. [Page Six]
• Oh, the horror: Laguna Beach bad girl Kristin Cavalleri is dating poptard Aaron Carter. [Gatecrasher (3rd item)]
• Ted Koppel prays for Good Morning America co-host Charlie Gibson to replace the late Peter Jennings at the ABC evening newsdesk; GMA first lady Diane Sawyer commissions Haitian housemaid to create Koppel voodoo dolls. [Lowdown]
• Notorious fagodrome the Roxy, accused of admitting underage patrons, meets the long arm of the law just in time to wreck their gay ol' Halloween party. And so the war on fun continues. [Page Six]
• PETA narrows its gaze on Prince Charles, who it intends to harass on his forthcoming visit to the states. Apparently the royal guards use real bearskin on their helmets, which has the animal-rights group's knickers in a bunch. [Scoop]