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At this very moment, countless numbers of piping hot, spanking new issues of Us Weekly and Star are hitting the newsstands. Both issues are bursting with the news of Angelina Jolie's latest decision to move in with Brad Pitt (just as friends, we're sure), but who do we credit with breaking this business? Surely it's becoming a minute-by-minute competition, where winners are determined at individual newsstands. Us wins at Lafayette and Spring, but Star just might take 59th and Lexington if the clerk's stocking schedule plays out right.

Meanwhile, not-so In Touch is covering whether or not Jessica Simpson had plastic surgery. How can we even think about something so trivial during a time like this?

After the jump, pages from Us's Brangelina Cohabitational Humpfest coverage.

Click both to enlarge.

This image was lost some time after publication.
This image was lost some time after publication.