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This ad was conveniently located in the Times' Washington section.
You know what? We're not even going to "snark" on this one. Instead, we're going to earnestly ask what the fuck is going on? Have we awoken this morning only to find ourselves in the 8th dimension, where the venerable New York Times has finally donned its Bonnie Fuller costume and is currently rushing Janice Min's sorority?

NYT