According to their publicists, 42-year-old Tom Cruise is tomfoolering around with Dawson s Creek alum, Katie Holmes, 26. Despite positive reviews for Wonderboys and Pieces of April, we can now expect Holmes career to pull a Penelope Cruz — who s finally back in rotation after spending three years pooing out movies like Gothika, Head in the Clouds, and (in a stunning crescendo) the TNT holiday classic, Noel. The conspiracy theorist in us thinks that this Cruise-on-Holmes coupling is merely an extension of the evil tentacle known as Curse of the Pie from Katie's ex-fiance, Chris Klein. Behold the American Pie cast: Jason Biggs, Brian Ian Whoever, and Mena Suvari ( Wherefore art thou, Career? ), Shannon Elizabeth (recently divorced), Tara Reid (no explanation needed), Natasha Lyonne (now molesting dogs), Chris No, I m fine to drive Klein (arrested for climbing his pie-eyed ass behind the wheel a few months back). So we should all brace ourselves for the references to Katie s career being up a creek that are bound to proliferate in print for years to come.
—NH
 Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes Dating [NYP]
Seventh Seal Finally Opened [Defamer]