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· After just two months, Julia Roberts is ready to auction off the innocence of her young children. Her infant twins (inexplicably named Hazel and Finn — just like your favorite domestic servants!) will appear on the cover of People magazine. [NYDN, image via]
· Sean Connery throws a Hollywood-style hissy fit and walks away from a $17.5 million paycheck; apparently he's tired of working on big budget films. Guess some people will avoid working with Brett Ratner at all costs. [Page Six]
· Flava Flav runs into oncoming traffic for Brigitte Nielsen, who had an asthma attack. No one was harmed—except for the careers of VH1 cameramen, who totally missed getting this on tape. [Lowdown]
· Usher allegedly had a six-way orgy; clearly the man has stamina, which explains how he could handle Naomi Campbell for so long. [Page Six]
· Janet Jackson's wardrobe will malfunction all by itself — if you so much as go near her, her bodyguards will chew off your arms. [R&M]