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· In the wake of Sundance, the reports flood in: Keanu Reeves won't take freebies, Tobey Maguire is "bloated," celebs get denied entry at the United Talent Agency party, Haylie Duff is inexplicably headed to Harvard, Shannen Doherty is shopping around a Sex and the City knockoff, and everyone hates Paris Hilton. [ELK]
· Oh, and Minnie Driver's people called ahead to assess the worth of potential gift bags. $6k in swag was apparently not enough to lure Driver to the freebie tents. [Gatecrasher]
· Kevin Federline, official Baby-Daddy and husband of Britney Spears, is getting a "metrosexual makeover" for a Details photo shoot. Having abandoned his bedazzled "pimp" jumpsuit, Federline will also appear in the April issue of L'Uomo Vogue. [Page Six]
· Tara Reid is still looking for Mr. Right and has enlisted the help of daytime lesbian guru Ellen DeGeneres. Send in a 60-second tape to DeGeneres and you might have a chance with Reid—do it now, before she wins that Oscar and becomes way too famous for this crap. [R&M (3rd item)]
· Further insight into Madonna's ties with the Kabbalah Centre reveals not only a penchant for pretentious British spelling habits, but that students eat off plastic while Madonna enjoys the luxury of real plates and silverware. [Page Six]
· Breaking news from Lloyd Grove! Celebrity poker is hot. We'll let this "scoop" slide, as it's Lloyd's birthday week. [Lowdown]