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The Defamer Special Correspondent on Decor in Celebrity-Backed Restaurants files this special sneak peak at Geisha House, the new Hollywood eatery backed by the same gang of That 70's Show cronies that brought you Dolce.

So, I was at the Victoria's Secret party on Friday at Demi & Ashton's new restaurant Geisha House (not opened yet, don't know when it's slated).

The usual suspects, Nicole Richie and Paris' understudy Kimberly Stewart, Kirsten Dunst Jakeless and wasted. But I have to say that the decor in the place is awful. Though it's Japanese-themed, there are a lot of inexplicable elements — booths are gated off from the center of the room with giant pieces of wood, the bar has the worst lighting ever (really, every single person in Hollywood knows that fluorescent is unflattering, but not the designer?), and some ropes hanging from the ceiling that might inspire a gym class style shimmy. I'm sure it will be popular just because of the names associated, but ugh. Just ugh. And the sushi was bad too!

You'd think that Kutcher would've been a little more hands-on with the lighting situation. The unflattering fluorescents might add 10 years to Demi Moore's appearance, making his relationship with her seem like some kind of creepy grandmother fetish. But maybe that's a taboo he's ready to explore now that he's bored with the "adopting Bruce Willis' kids" one.