Stepmom actress Susan Sarandon claims she “loves this pope,” but does she know something we don’t? Namely who he’ll be assassinated by, and when? I can’t say with absolute certainty that she doesn’t—especially after dropping this hint about his impending death to the New York Daily News.

“I think they’re going to assassinate him,” she said of the pontiff, who arrives in New York on Thursday. “I think he’s done some major, major cleansing of the whole system.”

Woah. Ordinarily I’d just dismiss this as idle celebrity gossip, but Sarandon did just sprinkle Timothy Leary’s ashes at Burning Man in what I can only guess was a Satanic ceremony, so sure she might be a part of some shadow secret society—can you prove she isn’t?

Now I don’t know if the pope even reads this website, but on the likely off-chance that he does, good sir, I implore you: stay away from Sarandon’s Flatiron ping pong club during your New York trip. I don’t think she’s going to assassinate the pope or anything—there are just better places to go out.


Image via AP. Contact the author at gabrielle@gawker.com.