In a devastating interview with the Washington Post, the father of murdered WBDJ reporter Alison Parker described his reaction to his daughter’s death. “My grief is unbearable,” Andy Parker said. “Is this real? Am I going to wake up? I’m crying my eyes out.”

Parker told the Post about how he and his wife first heard the news. First, he said, they received a text telling them that Alison had been involved in a shooting. “Initially, we had some hope, but I knew in my heart of hearts,” the 62-year-old told the Post. “Alison would have called me immediately to say she was okay.”

From the Post:

He is still in disbelief that his daughter was killed as a journalist in such a seemingly safe place.

“Some journalists want to be right out there covering ISIL. She did not want that,” Andy said. “She was not keen on jumping into a middle of a firefight some place.”

Parker also spoke about the horror of learning that gunman Bryce Williams filmed the attack and posted it online.

“It’s like showing those beheadings,” he said. “I am not going to watch it. I can’t watch it. I can’t watch any news. All it would do is rip out my heart further than it already it is.”

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