If Pennsylvania still had a poet laureate, it would be Duane Sedlock, the "Outdoorsman" columnist for the Allentown, PA Examiner.com site—a man unafraid to denounce the "low-income" "Orientals" who are destroying the ambiance of PA's historic casinos.

Duane Sedlock (pictured)—a real person, whose Facebook likes include "Two and a Half Men" and "Rock Music"—is not the type to sit idly by as the local newspaper runs a story about poor Asian residents of New York City who ride free shuttle buses to the casinos in Bethlehem, PA every day, just to scrape together a living by selling the free gambling vouchers they get when they arrive. Duane Sedlock is a man who will tell you the dark side of this story.

Most of the hundreds of daily bus riders pay $15 for a bus ticket, which includes a $45 free-play cards the casino gives them. Then moments after traveling the 100-mile trip and stepping off the bus they sell the $45 free slot play card at a discount to what is considered the underground market. Then it's off to aimlessly roam the town looking for mischief and mayhem until the return trip later in the day.

Good god. What sort of mischief and mayhem are these marauders instigating among the helpless locals?

First, many do some shopping but most of it is at the Wawa and the Bottom Dollar Store across the Lehigh River on the Northside of the city on Stefko Boulevard. But that's usually only for eggs which are relatively inexpensive, especially when you put x-large eggs into the smaller size containers. There is a strict 2 dozen limit of eggs per customer otherwise the days' supply of eggs would be sold-out in a matter of minutes on a daily basis.

Store owners and shop keepers are very leery when the flash mobs of Orientals hit their stores. Some on the Southside limit the numbers in their shops or lock their doors allowing only actual customers to enter.

Duane Sedlock, whose six favorite movies all star Jackie Chan, has frankly had it with these marauding bands of dirty, egg-swallowing cave people from the Far East.

The Sands installed hand-drying machines in their restrooms because the paper towels kept disappearing. Oh, don't be surprised if you see some the of New Yorkers bathing in the restrooms, that includes washing their feet in the sinks. And the casino also has had past problems with fleas and lice.

Some stay near the casino, sleeping on benches and tables along the Southside Greenway and at the SteelStacks campus. Or they trespass in nearby neighborhood yards and gardens pulling flowers and vegetables.

Eggs, flowers, vegetables.... what's next?

Others venture over to the Lehigh Canal, to do some fishing and hunting. Of course they don't have licenses for these activities but that doesn't stop them. They have refined the art of catching geese though. First, you feed them, than you snatch them, snap their necks and finally stuff them in your bag or cooler (if there aren't too many illegal fish already in them) for the ride home. Also, they will take along some wild grasses and wildflowers which are planted as riparian buffers along the canal and river.

Here you have a small, bucolic town in Pennsylvania, just trying to make an honest living with slot machines and blackjack tables, under assault from penniless Oriental hordes intent on purchasing every last egg in town and making who knows what sort of wildlflower omelette on the bus ride home. It's just not right. "One final thought," concludes Duane Sedlock, who publicly advertises the fact that he is fan of Advance Auto Parts, "if you go for a walk or run on the canal towpath and take your dog along, keep it on a leash, a very short one!"

Duane Sedlock has also done some groundbreaking work on the topic of "Cell phones; both good and bad."

[Photo: FB]