• Remember when Bethenny Frankel announced a few weeks ago that she was engaged to "a real estate bigwig" named Jason Hoppy? According to one "insider," the engagement may be a big publicity stunt, and Hoppy may be a "medical sales rep/personal trainer," not some property-owning master of the universe. [Fox News]
• A treasure trove of Madonna memorabilia, collected by one of her long lost ex-boyfriends, is going up for auction. Yes, 17 minutes of "erotic phone messages" could soon be yours. [P6, NYDN]
• Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush have broken up. Tragic! [People]
• It looks like Dr. Conrad Murray gave Michael Jackson a dose of the powerful anesthetic propofol right before his death and that was what killed him. And it looks like Murray could face manslaughter charges because of it. [TMZ, NYDN]
• Mischa Baron says she's feeling better and is ready to go back to work. [Us]

Jon Gosselin's pissed Kate Major's lying about them being together. Another parent peddles her kids for money when really, she should be a Spider Man villain. Lindsay Lohan gives me Gwyneth's GOOPy runs. Happy Saturday Morning, here we go:

• This may look like a still from a new Angelina Jolie movie. But it's not. It's the real Angelina Jolie, who made her third trip to Iraq this week and also stopped off in Jordan. What's she doing? She's saving the world, don't you know that? [NYDN]
• Kate Major, the ex-Star reporter who's been seen in the company of Jon Gosselin, might be out to be famous. Unbelievable! [NYDN]
• The Jackson family is out of money. That sure was quick, huh? [NYDN]

When Mischa Barton got on the train to Cuckootown we thought she joined the ranks of Britney Spears and Mariah Carey. Not really, because people seemed to actually care about their public descent into madness. Is the celeb meltdown passe?

Megan Fox turns down the chance to be the next Bond girl, Amy Winehouse goes on trial for assaulting a charity ball dancer, Lily Allen has a new man, Simon Cowell turns 50, and Jessica Szohr and Ed Westwick split.

• How does he find the time? It looks like Jon Gosselin has dumped his girlfriend from five minutes ago and is now focusing his attention on Star reporter Kate Major. (For this week, at least.) In what sounds like the most nausea-inducing meal ever, Gosselin and Major had dinner in the Hamptons last night with Michael Lohan and Jill and Bobby Zarin. [People, Star, Us]
• Rumor has it Gossip Girl's Jessica Szohr and Ed Westwick have split up. [P6]
• Jude Law got into a scuffle with a paparazzo last night. [Sun]
• Mischa Barton's publicist has been busy trying to land the troubled actress the cover of a weekly tabloid. Sadly, there have been no takers so far. [P6]

Michael Jackson may have a secret child, Billy Joel gets a rebound girl, Ruth Madoff travels in ripped jeans and a baseball cap, Britney Spears' father pronounces his daughter completely sane and Sienna Miller goes off on an interviewer.

• Is Andre Balazs the latest man to fall victim to Kelly Bensimon's feminine charms? Life & Style reports the hotelier and the "housewife" were seen getting cozy in Miami recently. [L&S]
• Kiefer Sutherland is in the clear. Prosecutors have dropped charges against him in connection with his assault on Jack McCollough back in May, since the designer has proved to be an "uncooperative witness." [NYDN]
• Mischa Barton is still in the hospital and may lose the role on the TV show that she was supposed to start filming this week. So what made her snap? In addition to all the drug stuff, she may be suffering from body image issues, too. [Sun, People]
• Ruth Madoff was supposedly spotted at LaGuardia en route to visit her husband in jail. And she was supposedly wearing ripped jeans, too. [P6]

• Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson are tussling once again. This time, Drea De Matteo was involved. And LiLo's clothes ended up in the street. [DM]
• Speaking of troubled young stars, Mischa Barton's rep is denying reports that it was Barton's drug issues that sent her to the hospital. [OK]
• Lizzie Grubman says she was asked recently to join the cast of Real Housewives of New York City, but decided to turn it down. Our loss, clearly. [P6]
• Because fake tanning is an art, Victoria Beckham has retained the services of a "personal spray-on tan artist" to help her "shading appear more natural." [DM]

Jon Gosselin just can't get enough ass, the Bush daughters were unholy terrors for the Secret Service, some Russian guy is sending death threats to Britney Spears, Michael Jackson's doctor is in hiding and Cameron Diaz parties with Jude Law.

• New details have emerged about Mischa Barton's involuntary trip to the hospital last week: According to the Post and the Sun, Barton was "so high on coke following a marathon three-day bender" that friends thought she might kill herself, and contacted the police. [NYP, Sun]
• Yet another fashion publicist is in legal trouble, apparently. Tim Mark Garcia, the new head of public relations for Marc Jacobs, is out on bond on "plunder" charges and is now facing extradition back to the Philippines. [P6]
• Not surprisingly, billionaire financier Pete Peterson is said to be "mortified" over how his grandson, PC, has come off on the Bravo show NYC Prep. [P6]
• French president Nicolas Sarkozy was in NYC this weekend. And he showed off his "chiseled" body when he went jogging in Central Park. [NYDN]

Jon, Kate, and the Cabal of 8 hit the streets of New York and their crew's already beefing with people. Also, Robert Pattinson's a shitty tipper, 50 Cent's a shitty real estate buyer, Mischa Barton's sad and crazy. Happy Sunday!

• The "unspecified medical condition" that led the police to take Mischa Barton to the hospital on Wednesday? She was placed under a 72-hour involuntary psychiatric hold, and she ended up missing the New York premiere of her new film, Homecoming, last night. [NYDN, P6]
• Britney Spears is dating her agent. But she's also spending alone time with her record producer, too. So she's keeping busy, clearly. [P6]
• Bethenny Frankel says she's hosting a new show called "Skinny & the City," but the woman who already owns the trademark to the name is going to see what she can do about that. [NYDN]
• Two people died in France after a set being constructed for an upcoming Madonna concert collapsed. It's all Madonna's fault, naturally. [People]
• Rubina Ali, one of the stars of Slumdog Millionaire, says she thought Nicole Kidman was "strange" after working with her on a commercial recently. [Us]
• Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's relationship is on the rocks, reports the National Enquirer once again. But the couple has come up with the perfect way to rekindle the romance: They're hoping to film a sequel to Mr. & Mrs. Smith. [NE]

Mischa Barton was supposed to be in New York tonight to attend the premiere her of her new movie, Homecoming, which was directed by Morgan Freeman. However, she won't be attending after cops were called to her home last night.

Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler are probably boning, Mischa Barton has a serious "medical issue," Jon Gosselin's new lady is a walking white-trash stereotype, The Hoff parties with Lady Gaga, Madonna has "bingo wings" and Robert Redford gets married.

• The police were called to Mischa Barton's home yesterday and she was escorted out of the house so she could be treated for some sort of "medical issue." Her condition hasn't been disclosed yet, but we're going to go ahead and assume it wasn't a case of seasonal allergies. [Sun]
• Bethenny Frankel may be giving up her spot on the Real Housewives next season so she can star in a Bravo show of her own. Neither Frankel and Bravo were willing to confirm the news, though, so we're going to keep our fingers crossed and hope this is just a crazy rumor that has no basis in reality, okay? [P6]
• Kim Kardashian almost got stranded in Africa when she couldn't locate her passport. The operative word there is "almost": Sadly, boyfriend Reggie Bush found it a few minutes later, so she was able to return to the U.S. [People]

Lilo stole the formula for her spray-tan product and passed on a starring role in The Hangover, Britney Spears visits the Eiffel Tower, Mischa Barton's wisdom teeth are making her bloated and Megan Fox steps out in an Armani dress.

Bradley Cooper and Renee Zellweger are so doing it, Kevin Jonas is engaged, Hayden Panetierre is totally naked in her new movie, Tinsley Mortimer is dating a German aristocrat and Mischa Barton gets kicked out of a London nightclub's bathroom.

[Nonentity Mischa Barton in London; image via Bauer-Griffin]

• Did Kelly Killoren Bensimon ask her boyfriend to lie about getting beat up so she could use it as a PR ploy to "better her chances of being asked back" on Real Housewives next season? That's what her bitchy co-stars are saying as part of a PR ploy to get the attention turned back on themselves. [NYDN]
• Estée Lauder CEO William Lauder is being sued by Taylor Stein, who gave birth to his baby in 2007, for stopping child support payments. [P6]
• In an interview with Matt Lauer, Michael Phelps says he made a "bad mistake" in South Carolina, although he's still not saying what this mistake was. [People]
• Lindsay Lohan has settled the lawsuit filed by a woman whose $11,000 coat LiLo took from 1OAK last year. Also: She left her poor bodyguard stranded in Las Vegas earlier this week. [P6, P6]