• Carson Daly has two reasons to get wasted today: It's St. Patrick's Day, of course. Plus he and his girlfriend Siri Pinter are new parents, too. [People]
• Jon Stewart's secret weapon in his rumble with Jim Cramer last week? His brother, Larry Leibowitz, is a senior exec at NYSE Euronext. [P6]
• A judge recalled Lindsay Lohan's arrest warrant yesterday after seeing the proof that she hadn't stopped attending a court-ordered alcohol education class after all. Also: She hasn't checked into rehab again despite reports to the contrary. Not yet, at least. [NYDN, OK!]
• Natasha Richardson was hospitalized yesterday and is now in critical condition after a skiing accident in Montreal. [People]

After seven years away and one epically hatey meltdown, Mel Gibson's big-screen comeback finally has a studio backer.

Christy Turlington celebrates her 40th today. Taye Diggs is turning 37. Kate Bosworth is turning 26. Former Times reporter Judy Miller is 61. Loews CEO Jim Tisch is 56. Restaurateur Michael Lomonaco is turning 54. Marshall Rose, real estate developer and husband of Candice Bergen, is 72. Actress Paz Vega is 32. Cuba Gooding Jr. is 41. Former House speaker Dennis Hastert is 67. And Michael Bloomberg's mother, Charlotte, celebrates 100 today. Weekend birthdays after the jump.

♦ Paris Hilton has broken up with Benji Madden after nine months of dating, reportedly so she can return to the party circuit and possibly reunite with her ex, Stavros Niarchos. The second part of Paris' plan might be tougher than she thought, though, since Stavros may have his eye on Annabelle Dexter-Jones. [Star, People, P6]
♦ Anna Wintour's reps say she has no intention of leaving Vogue. And she has no plans to accept a "cultural post" in Barack Obama's White House either, just so you know. [MSNBC]
♦ Have Madonna and Guy Ritchie finally reached a divorce settlement? The couple has supposedly sealed a deal that will let Madge keep her cash and allow Rocco and David to spend half their time living with Guy in England. [ThisIsLondon]
♦ Winona Ryder's British Airways flight had to make a special landing in London yesterday after she fell ill, allegedly because she "accidentally overdosed" on Xanax. [The Sun, NYDN]

If you've not yet discovered the LAT "Follow the Donors" feature yet, it's a searchable database tracking every individual who donated to either side of the Prop 8 campaign, alongside their corresponding place of business. It's a great way to check up on that receptionist with the troll dolls on her computer who's always yammering on about how great the new Michael W. Smith album is. You can also plug in celebrity names, of course, and see what pops up.We already found two donations from David Geffen amounting to $200,000, and, confirming reports, another $100k each from a "self-employed" Brad Pitt and Ellen DeGeneres. And what of donations in support of the measure? We managed to ferret out an "unemployed" Mel Gibson living in Cameron Park who gave $250 to the Yes side. Alas, this was probably not the star but a gay-hater of lesser means bearing the same name, as Cameron Park is a community about 25 miles outside Sacramento. Then again, you never know where the Malibu land baron might have a little pied-a-terre. We'll just assume it is the Apocalypto director until we hear otherwise.

The $42 Million Question. What would Mel Gibson's church do with that much in tax-free assets? The guesses are on this morning after the actor-director's Agoura Hills redoubt at the Church of the Holy Family recently revealed another $10 million tossed into its coffers, with few expenses beyond building add-ons and $69,000 in legal services. Gibson is reportedly the only contributor to the church, which has about 70 members and has performed no charitable giving of note. The Vatican doesn't recognize the man or the institution (and he doesn't recognize it), so how is an Oscar-winning anti-Semite to spend all that cash? God knows he's not putting much into his father's Web site, unless you count the $20 in sound effects thrown over that forboding picture of Jesus. [Fox News]

♦ Who's helping Madonna cope with her nasty, public divorce from Guy Ritchie? Best pal Gwyneth Paltrow, of course. "You know, she's a dear friend, and I'm supporting her in all [the] ways that I can... she's a very good friend." [Us, AP]
♦ In other Madonna news, Guy Ritchie now believes Madonna is spying on him, Madonna is now suggesting she wants to raise her kids in NYC, and Alex Rodriguez wants to move so he can be closer to the love of his life. [The Sun, People, R&M]
♦ Least plausible rumor ever: "Well placed sources" say that if Obama is elected president, he'll consider making Oprah British Ambassador. [TMZ]

In these rapey-sequel times, it takes a real man to stand up against the bloated revivals of franchise whose glories are long past. And while we'll assume that there is more to the implosion of Lethal Weapon 5 than just one jilted director's story, we'll take Richard Donner's perspective for now as some of the most reassuring news we've heard since doctors disclosed that Indiana Jones would recover from his violent auteurist tag-teaming last week. Saving it from Joel Silver's own heat-seeker makes it all the better.The film would have been the first installment in the series since 1998, when Lethal Weapon 4 grossed $285 million globally for Warner Bros. Original Lethal Weapon screenwriter Shane Black had a script out to Joel Silver, who wanted Black to direct after their collaboration on Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. The rest is speculation — which is just fine with Donner, who is on the outs with Silver and hypothesized that Mel Gibson vetoed the project himself out of loyalty to his six-time director:

Robert De Niro has been picking up work where he can — a speaking engagement here, a morning-show gig there — so we were more than little surprised last week when we heard he'd backed out of the thriller Edge of Darkness, currently shooting in Boston. That's not the De Niro who jumped to ostensibly greener pastures at Endeavor a while back, and it's definitely not the consummate professional whom producers brought aboard to make alpha-male magic with Mel Gibson and director Martin Campbell. But a report today out of Massachusetts offers no fewer than four scenarios making the rounds — chief among them being a sort of fantastically Kubrickesque golf-course torture:

• Kiefer Sutherland picked up a five-story townhouse at 763 Greenwich Street for $8.25 million. The 4,830-square-foot home, which was built in 1905, features a backyard garden and numerous fireplaces. [Berg Properties]

Mel Owes: Screenwriter Benedict Fitzgerald's misadventures in faith-based filmmaking continued Tuesday, when his second attempt to sue Mel Gibson for a cut of Passion of the Christ's $612 million global gross hit LA Superior Court. His first effort was rebuffed by a judge who said his complaint "lacked specificity and seemed to take a 'chain letter' approach" — although as we reported in February, the plaintiff's charge that Gibson and Co. "cobbled gobbles of money" from his undercompensated wares struck us as more sing-songy than anything else. Nevertheless, Fitzgerald's specificity literally doubled since then, with the jilted writer now seeking $10 million dollars in damages. We have yet to review the complaint itself, however, which we anticipate should reach us soon after the 10 people who received it yesterday attach postage and pass it along to their own selected 10. If this one bears any resemblance at all to the last one, we think we're in that group. [AP]

As Tom Cruise loves to remind us on his website, he's been prancing around Hollywood for 25 years, playing all kinds of roles we vaguely remember. But who knew all that hard work had been mere preparation for his landmark role in a one-man Village People biopic? In an apparent nod to American history, the patriotic Cruise temporarily abandoned hope for a truce between his army of Xenuphobes and Germany, choosing to split the difference and celebrate this wonderful country L. Ron Hubbard called home. In between the COS founder’s time traveling vacations to ancient Rome and DeLorean rides to the future, that is. And now that Cruise has donned a cowboy hat, tight jeans, and a fitted tee, he’s officially paid homage to each bandmate from that gayer-than-gay feel-good group of song-and-dance men who would surely welcome Cruise into a singalong of “It’s Raining Men.” So among Tom’s many characterizations of the Navy Boy, Earnest Construction Worker, Bad Boy Officer and, of course, Leatherman, which Village Person’s heels shoes does Tom fill out best?

Bringing to mind that little-known time when a snoring Anna Nicole Smith was briskly escorted from the Cannes premiere of Wong Kar-wai's 2046, chatter coming out of the desert has folks wondering what Britney Spears might be up to at the ongoing CineVegas Film Festival. This isn't quite like Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan hitting Park City to ostensibly promote their own films, after all; with four years remaining before Crossroads: The 10th Anniversary Cut makes the A-list fest rounds, Britney's attendance may have been purely incidental to the cinephile bedlam around it. Nevertheless, at least one observer (a fest juror, no less!) wasn't letting the celebritunity pass her by:

Two former members of the infamous Bimbo Summit were not late for very important dates this week. But one alum probably should’ve been. Worker bee Britney Spears was spotted having a one-on-one dinner last night at Havana Room, while pansexual couple of the moment Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson pretended to eat dinner with an unexpected new BFF at Il Sole on Monday. And while Britney’s knight in Hebrew-hating armor has proven himself to be quite the positive influence of late, we’re not so confident that Sam and Lindsay’s third wheel will strengthen Lohan’s so-far-successful ascent towards paycheck-earning, substance-free livelihood. The angel on Britney’s shoulder and devil on Lindsay’s revealed after the jump.

[Photo Credit: X17]

There’s nothing better than returning from a long weekend to discover not one but two incredibly positive stories about Britney Spears. Not only has the singer finally managed to make a public appearance looking downright hot, but she’s also begun dating a very eligible, scandal-free bachelor — William Morris agent Jason Trawick. As you may recall, Trawick was the mystery man splashing around Mel Gibson’s Costa Rica retreat with Britney last week, and reportedly has been looking after Britney ever since the beginning of her American Tragedy downfall. As a source tells OK!, “Britney totally trusts him and she has very deep feelings for him. It’s now got to the point where Britney wants to be with him full time.” And after seeing these pictures of the pair, who went public at an Ed Hardy party over the weekend, we can’t help but notice a very sober-looking Britney appearing genuinely happy for the first time in...ever:

Jennifer Aniston did it first, quickly followed by Blake Lively. Now Britney Spears has pulled out this spring’s most reliable accessory to nab a boy toy: the bikini. While sobering up at Casa Gibson down in Costa Rica, Spears spent the weekend looking happier than she has in months in two very itty bitty string bikinis adorned with tattoo parlor jargon. And in between bouts of boogie-boarding, golf cart-riding and rounds of Hide-and-Seek played amidst driftwood, Spears appeared to have successfully lined up a male suitor of her own. Who the mystery man might be, and a closer look at Spears' ongoing tendency to block her possibly-knocked up belly from sight, after the jump.

Slowly healing pop tart Britney Spears is reportedly vacationing at Mel Gibson's ranch in Costa Rica. (Ew! He's old!) Anyhoo, this is what she looks like in a bikini lately. I wanna go to the beach too! Waaah!

Back in March, we heard Malibu’s own Ken and Barbie, Mel Gibson and Britney Spears, were aligning their forces of stupidity for the greater good. But it was tough to figure out whether or not they were on a date or set to co-produce a new film starring each and every one of their split personalities. But thanks to recent reports, it sounds as though the partnership was neither love- or business-bound. They’re just two confused drunks trying to stay clean together! Master of sobriety Mel recently flew both Britney and her owner, father Jamie Spears, down for a vacation at his Costa Rican clam shack for some R&R. But why now? And more importantly, why does Britney keep hiding her newly rotund tummy from the paparazzi?

Today, People has revealed that Kate Hudson will appear as the cover girl for their 2008 Most Beautiful People issue, and we'd certainly like to send out a hearty congrats to the recently divorced single mom who's currently nursing Owen Wilson back to health. But after taking a look back at the list of stars who've previously nabbed the annual issue's cover spot, we fear there may be a curse accompanying the glossy honor. Sure, Leonardo DiCaprio (1998) and Julia Roberts (2000, 2005) haven't slipped up since having their smiley visage top the list, but a sizeable chunk of the winning alumni eerily saw their public and private lives undergo a downward spiral following their appearance on the issue's cover. We took a closer look at the possible curse-laden honor after the jump: