In your darkening Wednesday media column: J-school mania explained, the Food Network thrives, media conglomerates put on a happy face, and Adam Rubin gets plenty of sympathy.

Wired editor Chris Anderson has fully morphed from a journalist, who knows what it's like to have to interview other people, into a celebrity, who has no time for these fucking reporters and their boring questions. "Journalism," what's that?

The high society better-than-yous who summer in The Hamptons are under the impression that there is some legitimate moral stratification of Hamptons summer society magazines. They fuss and fight as if they were doing something marginally useful, or coherent!

McKinsey & Co.'s penny-pinching audit of Conde Nast is underway, and they're successfully striking fear into the hearts of employees at all levels. Apparently magazines are expected to "make money," now?

The idea that Eliot Spitzer's downfall was engineered by the financial industry whose profits he threatened with regulation has made the rounds on the internet for a while. Now Vanity Fair is siccing two investigative reporters on the story.

In your woozy Tuesday media column: MSNBC pulls in the crazies for airtime, Gallant former journo beats Goofus current journo, NYT family members catch the swine flu, and the LA Times is all fucked up.

• Ben Silverman didn't have much success during his two-year stint at NBC, but that didn't stop him from scoring a super-sweet deal with Barry Diller's IAC. His new venture will reportedly give him $100 million to play with. [NYP]
• Viacom, the media conglomerate controlled by batty billionaire Sumner Redstone, reported that profits plunged 32% in the second quarter. [NYT]
• Struggling McGraw-Hill reports quarterly profits dropped 22.7%. [PC]
• The Daily News and sportswriter Adam Rubin are refuting the claims of Mets management that Rubin tried to get himself a job on the team. [E&P]
• Amanda Hearst has landed a job at Hearst's Marie Claire. It's a miracle! [P6]

Michael M. Thomas — who left the New York Observer after 22 years with a declaration that owner Jared Kushner "stands pretty much squarely on the side of those whom I consider the bad guys" — reflects on the paper.

Yesterday the New York Mets fired their VP of player development for being a psycho—then tried to insinuate that a Daily News beat writer sabotaged the guy in order to steal his job. Today the reporter responds: No, liar.

In your mockable Monday media column: Fox News needs sources for a follow up to their "Tin Foil Hats" scoop, Thrillist gets down, Carol Rosenberg's colleagues speak, Tom Shales is replaced, and we are all corporate tools.

WWD has gotten to the bottom of that lawsuit filed by Condé Nast against the Turks and Caicos last Friday. It seems the archipelago paid for a bunch of ads in a handful of Condé titles in 2007 and 2008, but then never paid its $1 million tab. It also seems the ads played a role in a corruption scandal earlier this year:

• After two very unsuccessful years as co-chairman of NBC Entertainment, Ben Silverman is finally leaving the company. He's teaming up with Barry Diller's IAC to start some sort of vague media/advertising firm. He'll be replaced by Jeff Gaspin, who headed up NBC's cable unit until now. [NYT, NYT, DF]
• Disney's G-Force topped Harry Potter at the box office this weekend. [THR]
• Remember Friendster? It's up for sale, in case you're interested. [PC]
• HBO is the most "gay-friendly cable network," according to GLAAD. [Reuters]

The most memorable moment from last week's Walter Cronkite memorial service was Andy Rooney's heartbreaking inability to say much about his longtime friend after his emotions got the best of him. Last night on 60 Minutes, he tried again.

Tina Brown's keeping plenty busy these days, both feeling out the pain of the hoi polloi - but especially of those old media people she intends on stomping out - while failing to slide her kid into Harvard with connections.

We showed you the insider's guide surviving McKinsey & Co.'s culling of the Conde Nasties, but it turns out that reality television staple Survivor also hold plenty of (probably useless) advice to outwit, outplay, and outlast your coworkers.

The arrest of Harvard's star African-American studies professor Henry Louis Gates has reignited national conversation about things like racial profiling! The important part of the conversation, however? What the best of pop culture has to say about it, naturally.

At the ripe old age of 28, Ricky Van Veen is finally putting CollegeHumor.com behind him. He's leaving the site he co-founded and starting a production company called Notional. But the young man remains in Barry Diller's well-padded nest.

The New York Times has talked about charging again for some of its website; its CEO recently alluded to a "membership model with special offerings." What does that mean? Meet NYT Gold and NYT Silver.

CNN president Jon Klein has had just about emotherfuckingnough of this "Birther" shit on his network. Klein sent out this email last night telling Lou Dobbs et al that "this story is dead."

The TV station identifies this as a "Controversial Sign," but controversial to who? To the liberal media of Azle, Texas. Think, sheeple. [Guanabee]