The remains of 25-year-old Laura Garza, who was last seen alive at NY's Marquee nightclub in December 2008, were found in Pennsylvania near the home of main suspect Michael Mele, who is in jail for sex offenses. [NYP, pic]

The Hollywood Life editrix has spent years trying to teach us celebrities are just like us. Well, now she's living like a real celebrity by throwing her daughter a Bat Mitzvah fit for a queen. Marquee, swag, open bar! Wheee!

Yes, they were all at the West Chelsea club last night, and our tipster got all the dirt. Snooki is tiny, The Situation wears velvet, DJ Paulie Dashing is charming, and Sammi and Ronnie are still together!

Remember when Bungalow 8 was the hottest place in town? Yeah, memories of those days can be a bit foggy. With the news that it's closing we're looking back on the glory days of the greats.

Perhaps you were under the impression that Marquee, the Chelsea club owned by Noah Tepperberg and Jason Strauss—and now in its sixth year— had seen better days? Maybe you were thinking A-listers had moved on to Strauss and Tepperberg's new venue, Avenue? Apparently not:

• Rumor has it Thomas Keller is planning to open another restaurant to NYC in "one of the new high-rise buildings in Chelsea." Keller's denying it. [TFB, GS]
• The day in reviews: Frank Bruni is a little disappointed with Locanda Verde; the Post's Steve Cuozzo totally digs SHO Shaun Hergatt; Danyelle Freeman of the Daily News thinks Marea rivals Le Bernardin but is way too expensive; and GQ's Alan Richman and Bloomberg's Ryan Sutton both tackle DBGB.
• Andrew Silverman's City Lobster & Steak is now bankrupt. [Crain's]
• The NYPD is cracking down on narcotics sales involving club promoters. [BB]
• A man was indicted today for allegedly raping a woman at Marquee. [NYP]
• Momofuku may jump into the food cart fray. We'll second TFB's sentiments: "This gourmet cart/truck business is getting out of control." [Eater, TFB]

• The toughest reservations in town are at Frank Pellegrino's Rao's in Harlem and David Chang's Momofuku Ko, in case you're keeping track. [GS]
• Big clubs and bottle service are out and cheap, dingy dive bars are in, according to the Times, pointing out that Marquee's revenues are down 22 percent so far this year. Possible evidence to the contrary: "table service" at Marquee's new sister spot, Avenue, will run you a minimum of $350. [NYT]
• Related: Marquee appears to be NYC's "most fined" nightspot. It's handed over $100,000 to the State Liquor Authority over the past year alone. [NYP]
• New York's Eat Cheap issue is out. A highlight: Robin Raisfeld and Rob Patronite's "handbook" to the Neapolitan pizza "revolution." [NYM, NYM]
• Restaurants that recently opened, or will be opening soon. [Eater]
• A roundup of New York's "82 most notable burgers." [GS]
• The Canadian donut chain Tim Hortons landed in Manhattan today. [AMNY]

• Is Billy Joel planning to split up with Katie Lee? That's what the Enquirer is claiming this week, suggesting that Katie's "cozy relationship" with "hunky designer" Yigal Azrouel has caused Billy to consider dumping her. But not until his tour ends in November, which doesn't make much sense. [National Enquirer]
• A New Jersey man says Bruce Springsteen caused the breakup of his marriage. In divorce papers, he alleges Bruce and his estranged wife have been having an affair since the two met up at a local gym more than a year ago. [Star]
• Michael Phelps "skeeved out onlookers" at Marquee on Tuesday by drinking straight from a bottle of vodka and "dancing like a loon," all while making out with his cocktail waitress girlfriend. [NYDN]
• Breaking! Brad Pitt took sons Maddox and Pax to a Dunkin Donuts in Oyster Bay yesterday morning just like a "regular guy." [Star]

• It's not just high-end restaurants suffering due to the recession. Take a moment to think a good thought for Applebee's in Times Square. [NYT]
• NYMag's Adam Platt visits La Fonda del Sol, giving it one star for Josh DeChellis's "inherent talent" and another for its tapas. [NYM]
• Graydon Carter's Monkey Bar now has a reservations line. [NYT]
• The secret to Marquee's longevity, at least according to a Harvard Business School case study on the subject. [NYP]
• Jimmy Fallon took to Twitter after getting kicked out of Posto. [Slice via GS]
• Good World has closed its doors. [BoweryBoogie]
• A sushi spot in Midtown has a new roll: the Natalie Portman. [ML]
• Kate Moss may have a cookbook in the works. [Mirror]

Some wacky Harvard Business School kids decided to write up a case study on undead Chelsea celebuclub Marquee, probably so they could get past the doorman. They found out Marquee's profit:

♦ New York's Adam Platt hands out four stars to Drew Nieporent's Corton this week, praising chef Paul Liebrandt's cuisine as "technically complex without being exhibitionist." [NYM]
♦ David Chang's Momofuku Bakery & Milk Bar opened on Saturday. Grub Street has rounded up the public reception. [GS]
♦ A handful of spots including Marquee and the Tribeca Grand have been denied permits by the State Liquor Authority to stay open late on New Year's Eve. [NYP]
♦ A detailed history of the epic battle between Da Silvano's Silvano Marchetto and Bar Pitti's Giovanni Tognozzi. [Page Six Magazine]

♦ It seems the closure of Jason Strauss and Noah Tepperberg's Marquee this summer had more to do with a drug-related sting operation than a water main break. [NYO]
♦ Frank Bruni gives one star to Socarrat Paella Bar in today's Times: Although Socarrat's signature dish isn't perfect, it's "better than the paellas at many other Spanish restaurants in New York." [NYT]
♦ The fro-yo wars are heating up: Both Pinkberry and Red Mango have hired branding firms to help define their places in the fro-yo market. [AdAge]
♦ The East Village nightclub Mr. Black has been shut down after failing to pay taxes. [VV via Gawker]

♦ Nightlife impresario Noah Tepperberg (left) says bottle sales at Marquee have slipped 10 percent this quarter. [GS]
♦ Jean-Georges Vongerichten is paying $1.75 million to settle a lawsuit brought by waiters over skimmed tips at his restaurants. [Reuters]
♦ Todd English's Libertine opened inside Jason Pomeranc's Gild Hall hotel last night. [NYO]
♦ The city's best restaurants are in Hell's Kitchen; the best bars are in the East Village. At least that's what Time Out says. [TONY]
♦ Now that Dessert Studio has closed, Will Goldfarb is planning a move to Bali. [NRN via GS]
♦ Armed robbers are targeting Starbucks locations. [NY1 via Eater]
♦ JE Englebert, the owner of Suzie Wong and Prime, may sue the developers of the Gramercy Starck building on East 23rd Street because he doesn't like the small emanating from the McDonald's on the ground floor. [NYP]

• The Times' Diner's Journal weighs in on the Wine Spectator scandal. [Diner's Journal]

• Next up for Keith McNally: He'll try to bring his magic touch to the corner of the Bowery and Houston, in what's now a restaurant supply store. [Eater]

• Geoffrey Zakarian will reconceive the upstairs portion of Country as Country Steak. [Grub Street]

Turning 21 at Marquee? Wow. It's like there's some weird competition lately to see which New York socialite can become the next Paris Hilton. And in other lady-deb news, a tipster reports that Byrdie Bell was overheard the other night "talking about the Radar spread and how pissed her parents were about it." Well, do a little porn, your parents complain! It's crazy like that.

We grant that bouncers, by definition, have to be a little bit douchey, if only because they voluntarily signed up for a job that involves making snap judgments about people based on their looks, kissing celebrity ass, etc. (Hmm, sounds a lot like our jobs! Maybe that's why Rob the Bouncer was such a success.) But as this interview with Marquee bouncer Wass Stevens shows, some bouncers are douchier than others:

We've pondered its enduring appeal before but we think we've finally solved the mystery of Chelsea twatspot Marquee: It turns out to be Ground Zero for some of the most significant events of this young century. After the jump, the good people who flack for the club remind us why Marquee has made a lasting contribution to the city's - nay, the world's - social and cultural well-being. [Sic] rule in effect.