Maggie Gyllenhaal turns 32 today. CSI star Marg Helgenberger is turning 51. Singer Diana Krall is 45. Actress Martha Plimpton is 39. Retired pitcher Dwight Gooden turns 45. Olympic figure skater Oksana Baiul is turning 32. Actress Lisa Bonet is 42. Dean McDermott, the husband of Tori Spelling and co-star of the couple's reality TV show, is 43. Nobel prize-winning novelist José Saramago is 87. And the New York Post is celebrating its 208th birthday today, apparently.

• The Jeremy Piven sushi drama just won't quit. Piven's dispute with producers over his decision to leave the cast of Speed-the-Plow will now be heard by an arbitrator in June. But Piven doesn't seem too worried: He says he's "looking forward to testifying," since President Obama recently described mercury poisoning as "the world's gravest chemical problem." [Reuters, Us, TMZ]
• Sean Penn and Natalie Portman were supposedly spotted "making out" at the Sunset Tower Hotel earlier this month. At least that's what the Star says. [Star]
• Are David Duchovny and Tea Leoni getting back together? They were spotted "canoodling" on the beach in Mustique. [NYDN]
• Scarlett Johansson is on a "rigid diet" at the moment. She's also the "new muse" of Moet & Chandon, just so you know. [P6, WWD]

♦ Madonna and A-Rod are reportedly shopping for "love nests" on the Upper East Side. They're looking for something between Fifth and Park, from 60th Street through the 80s, in case you have any suggestions. Oh, and they're looking for retreats in Hamptons, too. [P6]
♦ The blame game begins: Ivana's friends say her split with Rossano Rubicondi was his fault because he's been dating a model. Rossano, meanwhile, says Ivana is to blame because she's been dating a model. [R&M]
♦ Robert and Blaine Trump are scheduled to make their first appearance in Manhattan Supreme Court this morning as the couple looks to end their 25-year marriage. Prepare for things to get "exceptionally ugly." [NYP]
♦ Uma Thurman's parents unknowingly hired one of the bookers from Ashley Dupre's escort agency to run their upstate yoga center. [NYP]

Union Breakers: As alluded to here by commenters on the town's latest labor strife, SAG president Alan Rosenberg and CSI star Marg Helgenberger have announced their split after 19 years of marriage. "They love and respect each other and remain committed to their family," their spokesman said in statement released over the weekend; the couple have an 18-year-old son named Hugh and are expecting their first strike together some time this winter. [People]

Fox News anchor (and former CNN hottie) Bill Hemmer turns 44 today. Prince Charles is celebrating his 60th. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice turns 54 today. Fashion designer Stefano Gabbana is 46. Reverend Run is 44. Writer P.J. O'Rourke is 61. Actor Josh Duhamel is turning 36. Jonathan Landman of the Times is 56. And Travis Barker, who almost didn't make it to his birthday this year, turns 33 today. Weekend birthdays after the jump.

CSI star Marg Helgenberger would like you to believe that she's busy reading the shit out of Richard Price's latest novel, Lush Life. Yet in reality, hidden behind that dust cover is a copy of US Weekly, which is actually hiding a copy of Highlights magazine, which is also being used as a diversion for another magazine, Penthouse Forum.

PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, so send them in often. Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line so we don't lose them) and tell everyone about the time you spotted Leave Britney Alone Guy enjoying cocktails in his adoptive homeland.

Realizing that the only way to silence Emmy co-presenter Quentin Tarantino when he's coked up to his hairline is to shove a tongue down his throat, CSI star Marg Helgenberger bravely takes one for the team.