It's the Common Core, you see, it's got the gay-making all built into it. Do an arithmetic problem all new and queer-like, and you go queer. This simple Florida lawmaker can see that. Why can't you? Are you gay or something?

Corporations are people. Like people, they have political opinions. If you're looking for the most Republican corporate persons in the world, you're probably thinking Koch Industries. But you should be thinking white bread and interstate-redneck food.