Lindsay Ratowsky — the former assistant to Lindsay Lohan, outed as the "LR" that Lohan rails against in her crazy rage-mail — has her own darkly criminal past. Ratowsky may be temporarily protected by her status as new assistant to Jessica Biel, but if Biel really is sorta "dating" NY Yankee Derek Jeter, Ratowsky could find herself drawn dangerously close to Lohan's home turf. (Incidentally, we personally spotted Derek Jeter sunning his golden physique on a Dominican Republic beach this past weekend, and he was complaining about some non-Biel chick he was trying to bone.) Anyway! Goldenfiddle runs a reader mail detailing Ratowsky's extremely amateurish attempt to steal a boutique necklace while masquerading as Lohan's assistant, even though she had already parted ways with the other Lindsay. Expect her to try and lift Jeter's 2000 World Series ring if not carefully monitored.