Possibly not coincidental with the recent resurgence of David Bowie's musical stylings, scientists have discovered a possibility of life on Mars. OH WOW WHAT DID THE ALIENS LOOK LIKE AND DID THEY HAVE LITTLE SHELTERS AND WERE THERE COOL PLANTS?

"The Supreme Court ruled Tuesday that suspects must explicitly tell police they want to be silent to invoke Miranda protections during criminal interrogations." You must speak your right to silence. Makes perfect sense, here on Mars. [AP via Wonkette. Related.]

Presidential Theater: Earlier this week, world's laziest presidential candidate Fred Thompson awoke from his midday nap (11am to 5pm) to start plotting out his next move. "Get me that job back as that mentor guy with five lines on Law & Order," he drawled to his agent. "What? Sam Waterston is doing that now? Too young! What about SVU? Maybe I could romance Mariska Harg..." He then fell back asleep, conserving his energy as the agent patiently pre-cut Thompson's dinner steak while booking him his first role since the presidential campaign: NYPD's chief of detectives on Life on Mars. Haha, remember when everyone was scared of this dude? [EW]

Maybe the reason the upcoming fall shows seem so unpromising is because we really don't know anything about them. Variety reports today that television critics and marketing executives alike are grumbling about the networks' extremely slow pace in sending out screeners and cobbling together promo clips. That's why we've been seeing the same damn Kath & Kim clip over and over again ("come in if you're sexy!") The strike, of course, is to blame. Because of the 100-day work stoppage, no one had enough time to film full pilots to screen for critics at summer press tours, when eyes are usually first laid on the new shows. "Half of the press tour was a waste because we hadn't seen the shows," a critic for the Newark Star-Ledger said. "I can't imagine writing a single thing based on any of the panels for NBC's new shows." Some hastily picked-up shows are also doing 11th-hour reshoots, like ABC's Life On Mars, which is being promoted with a few clips from the old pilot. That was shot and took place in Los Angeles. The new pilot is filming in New York. "It's a big challenge for us," said Alphabet marketing exec VP Mike Benson. "I've never had a situation like this fall where I don't have a show's pilot yet." It's big ol' mess, none of which bodes well for freshmen shows which rely on thorough marketing blitzes to attract any type of viewership. And now that's all been impeded. By writers! They're the most powerful people in the world! And they also sort of shot themselves in the feet!

On the New York set of Life On Mars, veteran character actor Harvey Keitel pondered the good old days of making movies when pennies weren't being pinched on beverages. Keitel fondly remembered being on the set of Taxi Driver and the quality of liquid refreshments. Keitel added, "They had these bottles of Coca-Cola the size of a dachshund. Honest to God, they were THIS BIG [makes gesture with hands] and you would've sworn that they had been flown in from the Artic Circle because they were so cold and refreshing. Nowadays, it's all this baby bottle business."