9 Reasons Why The Office's John Krasinski Would Choose to Star in a Robin Williams Movie [SuicideGirls.com]

You hardly need this dangerously low Tomatometer to tell you that License to Wed might not live up to the considerable comedic promise of most Robin Williams vehicles, but in the interest of piling on, we present this round-up of headlines exploring virtually every possible negative permutation of badness, legal documents, and the sacrament of marriage:

Today's informed consumers of Hollywood product are so barraged with information meant to influence their ticket-buying decisions that they hardly have time to read entire reviews, much less reviews of films sure to disappoint. And so in the interest of assisting holiday weekend moviegoers wisely spend their entertainment dollars, we turn to CNN.com's always-efficient Story Highlights box, which with a mere three bullet points has tidily eliminated one unpromising option from the crowded multiplex marketplace. A quibble, however: Assigning blame to the film's four credited writers unfairly ignores the hard work of studio executives who contributed to the projects failure by giving thoughtful notes like, "Can Robin Williams be a little less priest-y? But not totally unpriesty. This is Meet the Priest, after all. Reverend! Meet the Reverend. We don't want the Catholics picketing."

The Single File Eyes blog notices the disturbing similarity of the arrangement of the actors on the License to Wed one-sheet to the female reproduction system, a design we have to assume is intended to subliminally attract the film's targeted audience into theaters. It's a stroke of genius, really, as we've been so mesmerized by the side-by-side that the poster's central figure has completely melted into the uterus, making us forget that Robin Williams is even in the movie.