Lenovo, the global technology manufacturing firm that recorded nearly $30 billion in revenue last year, has named Ashton Kutcher, a former male model who rose to fame playing the stupid one on That 70s Show, as its new "Project Engineer." The time to dump your Lenovo stock is now.

I've gotten used to ads for tech products that portray anyone over 40 as a fumbling boob. But here's a question the bright-eyed young whippersnapper in Lenovo's new ad doesn't answer: Does his "one-button recovery" program also live on his hard drive? Answer: Yes, it takes up at 800 megs of disk space, according to the user manual. So if he drops his ThinkPad in the airport and busts the spindle, it's Fruit Basket Time.