Katie Holmes, actress and Bride of Scientology, turns 31 today. Hard-charging hedge fund manager Dan Loeb is turning 48. Brad Pitt turns 46. Steven Spielberg is turning 63. Christina Aguilera is celebrating her 29th birthday today. Dan Klores, the publicist turned documentary filmmaker, is marking his 60th. The head of the American Federation of Teachers, Randi Weingarten, is 52. Memorial Sloan-Kettering president (and Nobel Prize winner) Harold Varmus is turning 70. Troubled rapper DMX is 39. Keith Richards of the Rolling Stones is 66. Ray Liotta is turning 55. Model agency owner Faith Kates is 52. And former Miss USA Tara Conner is turning 24 today. A bunch of weekend birthdays is below.

• Courtney Love has lost control of her daughter. Frances Bean Cobain is almost an adult—she's 17—but a LA judge has granted guardianship to Kurt Cobain's mother and younger sister yesterday. Don't think it's because Courtney is on drugs or completely crazy (although she is). It's just that Frances is a "strong-willed child" and prefers to "live with her grandmother at this time." [People, TMZ]
• Alex Rodriguez and Kate Hudson have yet to confirm reports they've broken up, but it's looking like A-Rod has already moved on. He was seen in Miami this past weekend in the company of a "leggy blonde," and reportedly told another bunch of girls he was chatting up that he's "definitely single." [P6, NYDN]
• Tara Reid's redemption is underway! Not only is she hanging out with classy characters like Giuseppe Cipriani, she's announced that she'll be appearing topless in the January-February issue of Playboy. Welcome back! [P6, Us]

• Tiger Woods released a statement this morning: "I have let my family down and I regret those transgressions with all of my heart. I have not been true to my values and the behavior my family deserves. [TMZ]
• One thing that may have pushed Tiger to finally issue the apology: While Rachel Uchitel didn't want to cop to hooking up with Woods, two other women turned up to take her place yesterday. A 24-year-old waitress named Jaimee Grubbs appeared with tawdry text messages from Woods to back up her story. (Sample: "I will wear you out!") And a Vegas club manager came out to say she's been having an affair with him "for some time." [Us, NYP, NYDN]
• Tiger won't face criminal charges for crashing his SUV outside his Florida home. He's getting a traffic ticket and may pay a $164 fine. [Us]
• Bill Clinton is pumped his daughter Chelsea is marrying investment banker Marc Mezvinsky because, Bill says, Marc is a "great human being." Not only that, but when Hillary is traveling, Chelsea and Marc take pity on poor old Bill and take him to dinner and the movies. [People]
• Russian billionaire Roman Abramovich just bought a $90 million estate in St. Barts and now everyone is expecting him to throw the "It" Christmas party of the year. No word on whether the Salahis were invited. Not that the lack of an invite will stop them from attending anyway, of course. [P6]

• Rachel Uchitel, Tiger Woods' alleged mistress, is calling the allegations that she had an affair with the golfer "dumb," "stupid," and "ridiculous," and says "it's like asking me to comment if there are aliens on earth." Worst of all, she's bummed that as a result of this whole saga some "nice, normal guy" that she might eventually settle down with is "going to have a tainted view" of her. Meanwhile, friends and former colleagues of Uchitel say the party-promoting, celebrity-wrangling widow and divorcée has been obsessed with getting close to celebrities for years, is a "drama queen" and "fire-starter," and has had numerous run-ins with her employers in the past. [NYP, NYDN]
• What's Tiger up to? He bailed out of a golf tournament in California later this week and still hasn't come out of his house. [Us, NYP]
• Troubled Johnson & Johnson heiress Casey Johnson was arrested yesterday for stealing jewelry, clothing, shoes, and even underwear from a model pal. The really disturbing part: Johnson allegedly left a wet towel and "used vibrator" at the scene of the crime as her "calling card." [NYP, TMZ]
• Tareq and Michaele Salahi, "the most infamous party crashers in the world," appeared on the Today show this morning to tell Matt Lauer they did nothing wrong. The couple claim some mystery evidence—to be released at a later date— will prove they were invited to last week's state dinner. [MSNBC]

Catherine Zeta-Jones leaving her apartment to walk the dog ... Michael Douglas walking with kids Carys and Dylan ... Alec Baldwin chatting with Mary Louise Parker in Central Park ... Mickey Rourke buying a puppy with his girlfriend at a pet shop in the West Village ... The City's Freddie Fackelmeyer shopping at Kmart on Sunday with his girlfriend ... Donald Trump arriving on the set of Wall Street 2 ... Jude Law leaving his apartment in the Village ... Cate Blanchett walking with her kids ... Will Ferrell leaving Chelsea Market with his family ... Josh Duhamel taking a break from filming his new movie to play football ... and Russell Crowe leaving Club Macanudo on East 63rd Street.

Jude Law walking downtown with his personal assistant ... Tobey Maguire leaving the Four Seasons Hotel via the back door... Katharine McPhee hailing a cab ... Shia LaBeouf and Michael Douglas eating lunch on the set of Wall Street 2 ... Famke Janssen walking in the West Village ... Katie Holmes carrying Suri on the set of The Romantics on Long Island ... Adam Lambert leaving his hotel in Midtown and later arriving at MTV studios in Times Square ... Amber Rose arriving at a Cinema Society after-party at the Gramercy Park Hotel ... Catherine Zeta-Jones walking in Midtown ... and Robin Williams leaving the Trump International Hotel.

• Last night's state dinner drew quite a crowd. On hand of the occasion: Katie Couric (accompanied by beau Brooks Perlin), Gayle King (sans Oprah), Brian Williams, Mayor Bloomberg (with Diana Taylor), Ari Emanuel, M. Night Shyamalan, Steven Spielberg, Jeffrey Katzenberg, and David Geffen (accompanied by his youthful boyfriend). Jennifer Hudson provided the entertainment; Naeem Khan was responsible for Michelle Obama's gold dress. [Politico, Reuters, NYP]
• She may not be in rehab (yet), but Lindsay Lohan is supposedly now in counseling and seeing someone a few times a week. It's a start, isn't it? [MSNBC]
• In what may be the most dubious story ever published by Us, a source tells the tabloid that Angelina Jolie "hates" President Obama because he's "all about welfare and handouts" and is really "a socialist in disguise." Naturally, the source goes on to say that Brad Pitt is still a fan of Obama, which means the two "get in nasty arguments" about politics "all the time." [Us]

John Mayer making a girl's wildest dreams come true on the streets of Soho ... Lindsay Lohan arriving at JFK ... Katie Holmes shopping with daughter Suri and stepdaughter Isabella ... Jon Gosselin leaving an office building and heading to Cosi for breakfast ... Mark Wahlberg watching a Knicks game ... Zac Efron heading into Sarabeth's on Central Park South ... Josh Duhamel arriving at JFK ... Michael Douglas walking to the set of Wall Street 2 ... Liev Schreiber and Naomi Watts walking their dog ... Matt Damon carrying a cup of coffee on the set of The Adjustment Bureau ... Christy Turlington picking up daughter Grace from school ... ... Susan Boyle getting in an SUV outside her hotel ... and Rihanna waiting for her car outside JFK.

Christy Turlington walking with son Finn and their two dogs in the Village ... Woody Allen and Soon-Yi strolling down Madison ... Jodie Foster walking to the gym in the West Village ... Alec Baldwin having brunch yesterday at Five Points with a mystery blonde ... Susan Boyle arriving at JFK ... Miranda Kerr going to lunch at Friend of a Farmer on Irving Place ... Gayle King leaving Jean Georges after having lunch ... Katie Holmes taking Suri to see The Lion King on Saturday ... Harvey Weinstein eating at Sarabeth's on Madison Avenue ... George Lucas walking down Madison Avenue with his girlfriend ... Hugh Jackman walking in the West Village with his wife and kids ... Jimmy Smits having dinner at Cafe con Leche on the UWS ... Liev Schreiber and Naomi Watts riding bikes downtown ... Tyra Banks leaving MTV studios in Times Square ... Katharine McPhee crossing the street while talking on her phone ... and Jude Law walking in the East Village.

Scott Stapp denies that a tour bus video of him and Kid Rock is a sex tape, Jon Gosselin relinquishes primary custody, Suri Cruise has the worst time of her life at The Lion King. Welcome to Monday gossip.

Ashley Greene leaving The Box last night with Kings of Leon bassist Jared Followill ... Robert Pattinson out and about in the meatpacking district ... John Mayer getting out of an SUV in Times Square ... Brooke Shields shopping in SoHo ... Julian Lennon walking in Midtown with a friend ... Ed Westwick shooting scenes for Gossip Girl on Central Park West ... Cyndi Lauper exiting Roseland Ballroom through the back door ... Anderson Cooper leaving the Ralph Lauren store on his bike ... Taylor Lautner shopping at Calvin Klein ... Josh Duhamel on the set of The Romantics ... Fergie leaving her hotel ... Katie Holmes leaving a Starbucks on Long Island ... and Kim Kardashian shopping with her mom, Kris Jenner.

Olivia Palermo walking in Soho with her boyfriend Johannes Huebl and dog ... Calvin Klein leaving his apartment building ... Randy Jackson leaving his hotel in Midtown ... Sandra Bullock running errands downtown ... Penelope Cruz arriving at JFK ... Blake Lively filming scenes for Gossip Girl on the Upper West Side ... Alessandra Ambrosio walking around SoHo with a camera crew in tow ... John Malkovich on Madison Avenue ... Uma Thurman walking in the Village ... Miranda Kerr getting out of an SUV ... Katie Holmes on the set of The Romantics on Long Island ... Marion Cotillard arriving at JFK ... and Ed Westwick walking in the West Village with a D'Agostino shopping bag in hand.

• Down-and-out former pageant queen Carrie Prejean must be getting really desperate: She's turning to Donald Trump for career advice. Trump suggested she "become a major porn star," make tons of cash and then "give it to worthy causes." Clearly, it's this type of forward thinking that has made Trump the business titan he is. [P6]
• Nic Cage's lawyer now says the countersuit by the actor's former business manager—Samuel Levin claims he warned Cage about his "compulsive, self-destructive spending" years ago—is "ridiculous." As for Cage himself, he's in Somalia right now facing down evil pirates since he's under the impression that his life is one big action movie, but says he'll sort everything out once he gets back to the States. [P6]
• Lou Dobbs is taking a vacation now that he's no longer with CNN. Mexico is not on his travel itinerary, in case you were wondering. [NYP]
• Larry King's 10-year-old son is the luckiest boy in all of Los Angeles today: He's been signed to host his own cable TV show. Ain't nepotism grand? [TMZ]
• Amy Winehouse's dad says his daughter's new breast implants are leaking, which is why she's been in the hospital recently. But presumably that's to be expected if you poke yourself with needles all day, no? [Sun]

Iman crossing the street in SoHo ... Meg Ryan leaving Pastis after having lunch ... Jeremy Sisto pushing his daughter in a stroller in the West Village ... Sienna Miller getting in an SUV in Midtown ... Naomi Watts walking downtown with her son and her dog ... Katie Holmes shooting scenes for The Romantics in Southold, Long Island ... Levi Johnston walking around in a hoddie and holding a Men's Warehouse shopping bag ... Katharine McPhee checking in for a flight at LaGuardia ... Shakira leaving MTV studios in Times Square ... and Ashley Tisdale going to dinner at Ollie's on West 42nd Street.

Anne Heche taking a walk with her nine-month-old son Atlas ... Kate Winslet picking her kids up from school ... Michael Douglas and Shia LaBeouf walking on the set of Wall Street 2 in Battery Park ... Rihanna arriving at JFK before catching a flight to Europe ... David Duchovny walking down Third Avenue this morning in sunglasses and sweatpants ... Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes walking on the set of The Romantics on Long Island ... Hugh Jackman picking up daughter Ava from school ... Anna Paquin walking on the gym on Long Island ... Emily Blunt filming scenes for The Adjustment Bureau ... Sienna Miller walking her dog downtown ... and Gerard Butler standing next to his bike downtown.

Katie Holmes arriving at the West 30th Street heliport with daughter Suri ... Jennifer Aniston leaving the American Airlines Theater on West 42nd Street after performing in the "24 Hour Plays" ... Matt Damon leaving the set of The Adjustment Bureau in an Escalade ... Omarion and supermodel Alek Wek crossing the street in Midtown ... Gemma Ward getting out of a taxi ... Kristen Johnston walking in the West Village ... Rihanna going into MTV's studios in Times Square ... Sienna Miller walking her dog downtown ... Hugh Jackman leaving his building with wife Deborra-Lee Furness ... Jon Gosselin reading the newspaper outside the Joe & C Deli on West 72nd Street ... and Blake Lively filming scenes for Gossip Girl in Midtown.

Daniel Craig walking near Columbus Circle with girlfriend Satsuki Mitchell ... Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump walking downtown ... Iman crossing the street with her daughter in SoHo ... Michael J. Fox watching a New York Giants game ... Kelly Ripa and Mark Consuelos seated next to Howard Stern and Beth Ostrosky at Lure on Saturday night ... Emily Blunt leaving her trailer on the set of The Adjustment Bureau in Midtown ... Mel Gibson walking with a friend in SoHo ... Adam Brody on the set of The Romantics on Long Island ... Sienna Miller walking her dog ... David Blaine hanging out in SoHo ... John McEnroe walking up Central Park West ... Liev Schreiber and Naomi Watts pushing a stroller downtown ... Mariah Carey filming her latest music video ... Taylor Swift heading to the SNL afterparty ... Katie Holmes going to dinner in Tribeca ... and Alex Rodriguez and Jay-Z leaving Nello's.

Tyra Banks shopping in the West Village with a Gucci fanny pack around her waist ... Sienna Miller walking her dog (and picking up after her, too) ... Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen leaving an office building in Midtown ... Anna Paquin arriving on the set of The Romantics on Long Island ... Katie Holmes carrying coffee on Long Island ... Regis Philbin walking on the Upper West Side ... 50 Cent leaving the PIX11 Morning News studios ... Shia LaBeouf filming scenes for Wall Street 2 on the Upper West Side ... Edie Falco taking a break while filming Nurse Jackie ... and Glee star Cory Monteith leaving dinner at Southern Hospitality.

Billy Joel heading into a cigar club with "an unidentified pretty brunette" ... Madonna visiting a doctor's office uptown and later leaving the Standard Hotel with Jesus Luz in tow ... Samuel L. Jackson crossing the street in Midtown ... Adrien Brody chilling in the West Village ... Kelly Ripa picking up daughter Lola from school ... Taylor Momsen shooting scenes for Gossip Girl ... Carlos Leon kissing his girlfriend outside Café Gitane on Mott Street ... Frank Sinatra Jr. hanging out in Midtown ... Jerry Seinfeld and wife Jessica walking on Central Park West this morning ... Catherine Zeta-Jones walking to a rehearsal for her new Broadway show, A Little Night Music ... and Katie Holmes playing with Suri at a playground on Long Island.

Gemma Ward hailing a cab in the East Village ... Kelly Ripa and Mark Consuelos walking in Central Park ... Rihanna leaving the Gramercy Park Hotel and later arriving at JFK ... Sienna Miller talking on her phone on the street in SoHo ... Matt Damon returning to the set of The Adjustment Bureau in Fort Tryon Park ... Leelee Sobieski walking in Tribeca ... Katie Holmes and Adam Brody filming scenes for The Romantics ... Rachel Hunter standing on the set of Gravity in Central Park ... and Kate Hudson and Alex Rodriguez leaving Le Bilboquet on East 63rd Street after having lunch.