As plague of gibberish sweeps North America's TV personalities—from Judge Judy's linguistic meltdown to Serene Branson's migraine to Sarah Carlson's seizure to Mark McAllister speaking in tongues—intrepid British spaz rag The Daily Mail asks, is a government conspiracy afoot?

Judge Judy is hospitalized after a bizarre on-camera ramble. Vanilla Ice becomes a mime. Lindsay Lohan looks for an apartment in New York. Thursday gossip is in recovery.