Katherine Heigl was having a hot tub party with her husband, and they made so much noise, her neighbor called the cops. Is this lady annoying, or what? So! Very! Annoying! Sorry Kathy, there is no reversing this "image problem."

Someone on Mischa's yacht is a mole—is no starlet in St. Tropez is safe? Christina Ricci says Rob Pattinson is an "awesome" kisser. Ke$ha was a band geek. Hilary Duff is getting hitched. TGIFriday gossip.

Publicist (and new mom) Lizzie Grubman turns 38 today. Dick Cheney turns 68. Christian Bale is 35. Gene Hackman is 79. Wilmer Valderrama turns 29. Vanessa Redgrave is 72. Phil Collins is turning 58. Theater impresarios Harold Prince and Bernard Gersten are 81 and 86, respectively. NHL star Chris Simon is 37. Singer/songwriter Josh Kelley is 29. Weekend birthdays—including that of Andre Balazs—after the jump.

Sorry boys, It appears as if Scarlett Johansson really is taken. As we noted yesterday, 2006's Sexiest Woman Alive got engaged to equally easy-on-the-eyes boyfriend Ryan Reynolds, and judging from ScarJo's behavior last night at the Costume Institute Gala, the soon-to-be-bride appears incapable of hiding her joy. All smiles as she walked the carpet, Johansson even did the paparazzi a favor by flashing her new rock, and her choice to wear an off-white demure dress helped us paint some mental images of her upcoming walk down the aisle. But how does her ring compare to infamous engagement rings of the past (J. Lo's sad pink diamond monster mid-Bennifer trainwreck) and rings recently sported by newly engaged stars like Mariah Carey and Ashlee Simpson? We compare and contrast after the jump.

Katherine Heigl was spotted out and about in Los Angeles wearing a gift from hubby Josh Kelley's mother. Heigl may have been all smiles in front of the cameras, but once the newlyweds got into the SUV, it was a whole other story. Kelley was reported to have been seen crying at the corner of Wilshire and Santa Monica Blvd after a tongue-lashing about Katherine's desire to not be photographed wearing Joseph's Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.

"Joshua" Kelley, the husband of Katherine Heigl, went out of his way to put an end to the rumors floating around The Internets that he's whipped. Kelley explained that rockers like him couldn't be whipped because, while on paper he might be married to Heigl, he's actually married the greatest woman of all time, music. "The last time I checked, polygamists aren't whipped," smirked Kelley. He then took a long swig from the water bottle under his arm, which didn't actually contain any water, but rather 20 ounces of Bacardi 151. Rockers!

Katherine Heigl is not a doctor, but she plays one on TV. Scratch that, we just learned that she plays one in real-life, too! The Emasculation of Joshua Tour never fails to disappoint, as evidenced by Joshua's admission to People that it was none other than Katherine who diagnosed him with Attention Deficit Disorder, thereby saving him from a life of scribbling doodles for spare change:

We can think of no better way to cap off a Wednesday than by relaying for you all the details surrounding Katherine Heigl's overcompensating 28th birthday party for the new husband she completely took for granted on a recent Late Show with David Letterman appearance. We now bring you directly to the PEOPLE EXCLUSIVE report, live from the Katherine Heigl's-husband-appreciating birthday scene. (All hors d'oeuvre descriptions must exclusively credit PEOPLE EXCLUSIVE.):

Katherine Heigl's pantsless hubby Josh Kelley is kind of like the poor man's Chris Martin: he sings sad little wimpy songs, isn't the best-looking guy in the room and bores us to tears in interviews, but he somehow still managed to convince a gorgeous blonde actress to pay his rent. But hey! He writes songs for her! So all is forgiven. Well, besides the fact that he says things like "holla!" and "hot diggity dog!" with no shame. In this clip from Extra, we finally get some insight into how exactly he managed to score the insanely hot (yet terribly controlling) Katherine Heigl. Josh, you had her at...actually we still can't figure it out. Anyone?