As a tribute to Nobel Prize-winning author Jose Saramago, Playboy Portugal reimagined Saramago's novel The Gospel According to Jesus Christ as a soft-core porno. Now Playboy Enterprises is renouncing its blasphemous Portuguese branch—and shuttering Playboy Portugal.

On his way to an appearance on a grilled cheese sandwich, Jesus took a wrong turn and found himself in a Portuguese brothel. What would Jesus do? Here's Portuguese Playboy to answer this urgent question with NSFW photos.

Maggie Gyllenhaal turns 32 today. CSI star Marg Helgenberger is turning 51. Singer Diana Krall is 45. Actress Martha Plimpton is 39. Retired pitcher Dwight Gooden turns 45. Olympic figure skater Oksana Baiul is turning 32. Actress Lisa Bonet is 42. Dean McDermott, the husband of Tori Spelling and co-star of the couple's reality TV show, is 43. Nobel prize-winning novelist José Saramago is 87. And the New York Post is celebrating its 208th birthday today, apparently.