Both landing a job and finding a way to fulfill sexual fantasies can be difficult things to do. Sadly, after writing a bomb threat on the back of his restaurant job application, a man in Nebraska is no closer to achieving either goal.

In honor of Labor Day, the U.S. Department of Labor has launched MySkillsMyFuture.org, "a new website to help out-of-work Americans find new opportunities." If you're an undertaker or an NFL player, they've got jobs for you! But poor rodeo clowns!