Ever since Kanye West commanded a roomful of people in New Jersey to make claps at his "baby mama," the Internet has been monitoring Kim Kardashian for clues as to what kind of mama she will be to his baby.

Brad is afraid Angie will stab him in his sleep. Kelly Rowland has a double nip slip. Kate Gosselin lures a man with cupcakes, and fails. Jennifer Lopez wears four pairs of Spanx at once. Tuesday gossip draws shallow breaths.

Xtina used to call Kelly fat, and now Kelly is getting her revenge. Marc Anthony begs to get J.Lo back. Nicki Minaj has a nip slip. Kate Bosworth has turquoise hair. Nicole Richie makes fat jokes about Jessica Simpson. TGIFriday gossip.

Kimora Lee gets uncomfortably honest about weight loss. Jessica Simpson uses her boobs to get out of parking tickets. 94-year-old Zsa Zsa Gabor may be a mother again. TGIFriday gossip.

• Michael Lohan is "hurt' by the fact that Lindsay Lohan wants to drop her last name, Madonna-style: "I'm proud of the Lohan name. It's a name of integrity," he told the Daily News. "We all had very successful jobs on Wall Street. My father was an unbelievable provider. My sisters are pillars of the community. There's not a blemish in my family outside of me." So maybe Lindsay should change her name to Lindsay "Not-Michael-Lohan". NYDN]