Here's a funny story: White musician heavily influenced by long-dead black musicians hates other white musician heavily influenced by long-dead black musicians. Why? Unoriginality, of course.

Musician Jack White's ex-wife—not Meg White, the other one—has received a restraining order against the Detroit rock star after alleging that his paranoid harassment in the wake of their divorce has made it so she "fears for her and the children’s safety."

The lyrics of Jack White's "Love Interruption" go: "I want love to walk right up and bite me / Grab a hold of me and fight me." During his Grammy Awards performance with Ruby Amanfu, it sounds like one or both of them may have said "fuck" instead of "fight." But maybe they didn't.

Jack White played a show last night at Radio City Music Hall. It was heavily hyped. Understandably, people were very excited to see the ex-White Stripe frontman do his thing. The feeling, apparently, was not mutual as White stopped playing after just 45 minutes. While it's not entirely clear what set White off, he was at one point upset with a lack of crowd participation, or something.

When aging musical jack-of-all-trades Jack White of the White Stripes and his model wife Karen Elson announced their divorce to friends, it wasn't with teary phone calls in the middle of the night, it was with an invitation. They're throwing a divorce party!

Here's video straight out of SXSW of Jack White playing in front of his "Third Man Records Rolling Record Store." The vehicle serves as a store, recording studio, and also the backdrop for this very-cool set.

Here musicpreneur Jack White shares his company's 2011 innovations, including fuchsia vinyl with The Greeting Card Gatefold™ (plays when you open it) and a monkeys-singing-Swedish-metal machine. Superwin: the Reggie Watts hair record, made from real hair.

When Conan O'Brien collaborated with Jack White, no one was sure what their "music" would sound like. Today we get our first preview of "And They Call Me Mad," where the comedian voices an updated Dr. Frankenstein.

Courtney Love turns 45 today. Tom Hanks is turning 53. Jack White is 34. Jimmy Smits is 54. Floyd Abrams, the famed First Amendment attorney (and father of Dan), turns 73. Author/neurologist Oliver Sacks is turning 76. Former defense secretary Donald Rumsfeld is 77. ACLU honcho Anthony Romero is 44. AIDS activist Mathilde Krim is turning 83. Architect Michael Graves turns75. Actor Chris Cooper is 58. Netscape co-founder Marc Andreessen turns 38. Author Dean Koontz is 64. Fred Savage of Wonder Years fame turns 33. Actress Kelly McGillis is 52. And OJ Simpson is celebrating his 62nd birthday behind bars today.

Alanis Morissette—angry/thoughtful lady-pop voice of the 90s—sometimes acts. She showed up as God in Dogma and a bisexual on Sex and the City. And now she's appearing on Weeds for seven episodes. And we're pretty happy about it.

Though a brief, instrumental version of the new James Bond theme was released alongside a Coca-Cola commercial last week, it's only now that we can hear the full, yowling power of the Jack White/Alicia Keys duet entitled "Another Way to Die." Equal parts hair metal, Bondian bombast, and just plain weirdness (with a healthy helping of White's own "Seven Nation Army"), it's definitely... different. Does it fit into the 007 oeuvre, or will it start Quantum of Solace off on a dissonant note? Enjoy the song (and the additional eye candy) in the video above. Amy Winehouse, your move! [Stereogum]

There are no quantums of solace to be found today in the Jack White household, where the recent unveiling of his and Alicia Keys's theme song to Quantum of Solace via a Coke commercial has the songwriter lashing out at his Sony patrons. "Jack White was commissioned by Sony Pictures to write a theme song for the James Bond film Quantum Of Solace, not for Coca Cola," read a statement obtained over the weekend by NME. "Any other use of the song is based on decisions made by others, not by Jack White. We are disappointed that you first heard the song in a co-promotion for Coke Zero, rather than in its entirety." Ah ah ah — make that Coke Zero Zero Seven, rebranded exclusively for the occasion of Quantum's release this November. We'll withhold judgment of the song itself until we can hear it in its entirety, but the sample available after the jump certainly sounds low-calorie.

It seemed too good to be true, and indeed, it was: after rumors surfaced that Amy Winehouse had been tapped to sing the theme song for the upcoming James Bond film Quantum of Solace, the troubled songstress fell out of the project (having recorded nothing but confused shrieks of "Oi! Blaaaake" over a propulsive string quartet). Now, Bond producers have turned to an unlikely pair to record the series' first duet:

· Warning: Following this link to an animated image of Paris Hilton's mastery of one "look" may result in the involuntary loosening of your bowels and/or seizures. Click at your own risk.
· Photographs of Tara Reid looking inebriated are the planet's only true inexhaustible resource.
· Who will win the live West Wing debate? Our guess: Whatever's on CBS at the time.
· Jack White makes selling out seem so cool and authentic.
· Hey, dueling Popes!
· This story about the all-girl band that Bono pulled on stage to play an impromptu song would be awesome and heartwarming if a) we had a sense of awe or a heart, b) it didn't absolutely reek of pre-planned publicity stunt, c) all the world's impromptu-pulling-of-girls-onto-stages magic hadn't been consumed by the Dancing in the Dark video in 1983.

Post-punk superstar Jack White (of the White Stripes) on his upcoming interview with Dave Eggers' soon-to-be-published magazine, The Balloonist:
"Dave Eggers ?"
"The guy who wrote A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius," his publicist told him.
"Oh, O.K.," he said. He still didn t know.
[Ed. noteSomewhere someplace, in a dark room, Dave Eggers sits fuming...]
Elephant in the room: White Stripes hit New York [Observer]