Was today National Divorce Day or something? (No, April 16 is.) It sort of seemed like it was, though. Beyoncé's mom served her dad with divorce papers today. Ivana Trump filed to divorce Rossano Rubicondi this afternoon. LeAnn Rimes' husband served the country singer. And Jon and Kate Gosselin's divorce was finalized today, too. Elin Nordegren isn't there just yet, she's one step closer: Today she retained a lawyer to handle her divorce from Tiger Woods. Here's hoping your day wasn't nearly as eventful. [LAT, AP, People]

• Jake Gyllenhaal just split up with Reese Witherspoon. Has he already moved on with Anne Hathaway? That's what the National Enquirer is suggesting. So it could be true, but it could also be totally made up. [ShowbizSpy]
• In other Anne Hathaway news, it turns out the guy who crashed his bike into the car she was sitting in earlier this week was a paparazzo. [AP]
• Demi Moore posted a pic of herself to Twitter—it was an outtake from a recent Harper's Bazaar photo shoot—and fellow Twitter users unleashed their wrath, suggesting the photos had been Photoshopped and telling her she looked old. "I'm 47. How am I supposed to look?" she responded. This actually makes us feel a bit bad for Demi, which isn't something that happens very often. [Us]
• "Snooki" (Nicole Polizzi) from MTV's Jersey Shore has been fired from her receptionist job for taking time off to go to LA to promote the show. (She's not too broken up about it. She got to hang out with Kristin Cavallari while she was there, so it was totally worth it.) In other Snooki news, the guy who punched her in the face on the show, a scene MTV censored, says he's sorry. [NYDN, Us]

• Rosie O'Donnell told Howard Stern yesterday that she "had a chance to romance" Angelina Jolie back when they were both single and they talked on the phone a few times, but they never ended going out for dinner as planned, alas. She also says Petra Nemcova once sent her "love signals" when the model was a guest on Rosie's talk show, but she didn't capitalize on that opportunity either. Rosie has a new satellite radio show launching next week, so don't be surprised if more of these missed love connections surface in the coming days. [NYDN, CM]
• In other creepy celebrity sex news, a new book by controversial biographer Andrew Morton claims that Angelina Jolie slept with her mother's live-in boyfriend when she was 16 years old. And a second Jolie tell-all, to be published on December 1, claims Angie once contemplated suicide, has a history of heroin use, and, when it comes to her relationship with Brad Pitt, has "successfully manipulated the public into believing a glamorous fairytale that bears little resemblance to the reality of the pair's life together." [DM, Us]
• Ashley Dupre popped by Scores last Saturday night. She didn't strip, but she did make out with her new boyfriend PJ all night, so patrons of the strip club didn't go home totally empty-handed. [P6]

Soul Sisters: Well-preserved divorcées Ivana Trump and Denise Rich at last night's "Angel Ball" at Cipriani Wall Street, an annual event that raises money for Rich's cancer research foundation.

It's a good thing we've been closely monitoring the pages of ¡Hola! magazine. Otherwise we might have never realized that the "EXCLUSIVE tour" of Ivana Trump's townhouse on People's website was comprised of the same photos that appeared in the Spanish-language tabloid almost two months ago. But it's a good thing that Ivana's shockingly embarrassing taste in home décor has now been exposed to readers on multiple continents, isn't it? [¡Hola!, People]

Ivana Trump and daughter Ivanka Trump recently took some time out of their busy schedules to pose for !Hola! The intimate (and very "exclusiva") portraits catch them in a few rare moments of solitude, lounging with their exotic cats and straining to express emotion. So are the creatures in this photo cougars? Leopards? Given Ivana's dating history (not to mention the title of her lightly-watched reality TV show from a few years back), we're going to assume it's the former. [Popbytes]

• Madonna's kicked boytoy Jesus Luz to the curb and is thrilled to be single again, reports Britain's Daily Mail based on the things she's been telling fans on Twitter. But as the Times reminds us today, lots of celebs only pretend to use Twitter, so you don't have to give up hope entirely just yet. [DM]
• In related news, Madonna is expected to arrive in Malawi this weekend so she can add another baby to her collection of human accessories. [NYDN]
• Agyness Deyn and Albert Hammond Jr. only broke up recently, but she may have already moved on: She was spotted at a "rebound dinner" earlier this week. [P6]
• More trouble for CNBC: The network's golden boy, Dylan Ratigan, may be heading out the door after clashing with management. [P6]
• Ivana Trump may have reunited with her ex, Rossano Rubicondi. [P2L]
• Mega real estate broker Kathy Sloane has been hit with $248K tax lien. [P6]

• Whoops! Jeremy Piven was seen eating a mercury-laden plate of tuna tartare and calamari salad last weekend, although his publicist is now denying the account. [MSNBC]
• "Insiders" say that Ivana Trump and Rossano Rubicondi did not, in fact, marry because they were hopelessly in love, but because it was all part of a deal to stir up some publicity and the two even had a contract drawn up. Our faith in romance has been crushed! [NYDN]
• How did the press know Chris Brown was in Miami with Rihanna last weekend? He told them so, silly. In related news, Rihanna is reportedly refusing to testify against him (even though prosecutors plan to move forward). And Brown is scheduled to be arraigned today, although it's unclear if he'll make a courthouse appearance. [P6, NYP, People]
• Jeff Toobin changed his Facebook status to "Married" yesterday. That'll clear everything up! [P6]

Ivana Trump turns 60 today. Anderson Cooper's mother, heiress Gloria Vanderbilt, is 85. Cindy Crawford is 43. Sidney Poitier turns 82. Coach president Reed Krakoff is 45. Grace Hightower De Niro is turning 56. Knicks guard Stephon Marbury is 32. Patty Hearst is turning 55. Architect Deborah Berke is turning 55. Charles Barkley is 46. Senator Mitch McConnell is turning 67. Actress Lauren Ambrose is 31. And poor Rihanna turns 21 today. Weekend birthdays after the jump!

So it turns out that various "natural" weight-loss supplements may actually contain real drugs, but you'll have to hurry to get your hands on them before the FDA sniffs out all the products that don't disclose their exciting illicit ingredients. Following a class action lawsuit against StarCaps by NFL players who tested positive for the drug bumetanide, the pills—which are sold by surgerized socialite Nikki Haskell with the tagline "Dare to be thin!" and endorsed by her friends like Ivana Trump—have been pulled from the shelves of stores like GNC, and the FDA is continuing to test other diet supplements.

Depending on your perspective, it's either a reassuring indication that the global recession can't be as bad as all that, or the kind of tasteless display of decadence that no longer has any place in the new economy: Couture fashion week in Paris is currently underway with shows as lavish as ever, even though you'd think that dresses costing a quarter of a million dollars might have a slightly shrinking client base. Dior designer John Galliano, who put on a show yesterday that cost around $3 million, points out that his job "is to make women dream. Of course I'm aware of the credit crunch, but it is not a creative crunch—not at the house of Dior, anyway."

Alarming news for society types who enjoy dressing up their dogs in elaborate outfits: Britain's animal welfare group, RSPCA, is threatening to take legal action against pet owners who "over-dress" their pooches in "restrictive clothing." Fortunately for Tinsley Mortimer, Cece Cord, and Ivana Trump, there's no such law on the books in New York yet. But if our fondness for all things British (Topshop, Agyness Deyn) is any indication, it may just be a matter of time! [Daily Mail]

Jessica Szohr taking some of her hard-earned GG cash out of an ATM at a deli on the Upper East Side ... Barbara Walters walking down the street by herself ... Beth Ostrosky arriving at Fox for a TV appearance ... Jennifer Connelly leaving ABC studios after an appearance on Regis & Kelly ... Leighton Meester and Blake Lively filming scenes for Gossip Girl on the Upper East Side ... Michelle Williams reading a magazine while crossing the street ... Heather Graham standing on the sidewalk ... Amy Adams posing for pics outside Letterman ... Katie Holmes crossing the street with Suri in the East Village ... and Ivana Trump and Star Jones standing outside La Goulue on Madison Avenue.

♦ It's not just creditors going after Donald Trump these days: An employee of Trump's golf course in LA says in a lawsuit that the club prohibited her from taking lunch and bathroom breaks. She's only asking for $15,000, though, so obviously she didn't learn much during her stint working for the real estate mogul. [TMZ]
♦ A lawyer for Kelly Ripa and Mark Consuelos says there's "not a shred of truth" to the rumors the couple is splitting up. [OK!]
♦ Britney Spears' birthday party didn't exactly go as planned. None of her close friends showed up and onlookers say she spent the whole time looking "vacant" and "empty." [R&M, P6]
♦ NBC is furious that news of David Gregory's Meet the Press promotion leaked earlier this week. The likely culprit? NBC political director Chuck Todd. [P6]

♦ Madonna and A-Rod are reportedly shopping for "love nests" on the Upper East Side. They're looking for something between Fifth and Park, from 60th Street through the 80s, in case you have any suggestions. Oh, and they're looking for retreats in Hamptons, too. [P6]
♦ The blame game begins: Ivana's friends say her split with Rossano Rubicondi was his fault because he's been dating a model. Rossano, meanwhile, says Ivana is to blame because she's been dating a model. [R&M]
♦ Robert and Blaine Trump are scheduled to make their first appearance in Manhattan Supreme Court this morning as the couple looks to end their 25-year marriage. Prepare for things to get "exceptionally ugly." [NYP]
♦ Uma Thurman's parents unknowingly hired one of the bookers from Ashley Dupre's escort agency to run their upstate yoga center. [NYP]

Recently, we suggested that 59-year-old Ivana Trump's much-younger Italian gigolo husband Rossano Rubicondi was "dubious" and perhaps "masquerading as a heterosexual." Well, she has—surprise!—separated from him. They married last April and secretly split three months ago, but didn't announce it until now. That means they maintained exactly 4 months of wedded bliss. How will she spin this in her Page Six Magazine column? This week's installment was a bit outdated: "Every Christmas, I go to Aspen with my mom, and my husband, Rossano..." who is photographed making out with another woman after the jump.

They said it wouldn't last, and, well, it didn't. After repeatedly denying her marriage was on the rocks, Ivana Trump issued a statement this morning confirming that she and Italian playboy Rossano Rubicondi are divorcing. Ivana actually says she filed for legal separation three months ago, which means the couple was together for just four months following their lavish nuptials at Mar-a-Lago back in April. (This also sets a new record for the former wife of the Donald: Her second marriage to Riccardo Mazzucchelli lasted a full 20 months.) So what caused the split between the 59-year-old grandmother and her 35-year old third husband? It was just a matter of geography, apparently. Ivana says Rubicondi wanted to "live in Miami and work in Milan," but she's a New Yorker who would rather go to "Miami for weekends, and Milan to see friends and go shopping." And, really, how could a couple survive something as serious as that?

♦ Amy Winehouse's loving, supporting marriage to Blake Fielder-Civil appears to be over. Now free from police custody, Blake appears to have taken up with a German model named Sophie Schandorff, which means Amy will have to find someone else to fulfill her sex fanatasiesd described as "too gross" to "mention in a newspaper." [P6, NOTW]
♦ Chef Gordon Ramsay has been carrying on an affair with "Britain's most famous mistress" for the past seven years. Allegedly. [NYP]
♦ Michael Jackson and the sheik who sued him last week for $7 million have a reached a settlement. [NYDN]

♦ You weren't the only one who stayed up to watch election results. Brad Pitt and Oprah watched the festivities from Grant Park in Chicago. Harvey Weinstein had a party at Public House attended by James Franco, Josh Lucas and Jessica Alba. Robin Williams and Billy Crystal watched Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert live. And in LA, Courteney Cox and David Arquette hosted an Obama victory party attended by Jennifer Aniston, John Mayer and Sacha Baron Cohen, among others. [R&M, E!]
♦ Star is standing by its Jennifer Aniston pregnancy story. The mag claims she's undergoing fertility treatments so she can get pregnant by her 40th birthday in February. [Star]
♦ Are Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes planning to have another baby? [OK!]

♦ A long list of celebs have been involved in a last-minute effort to get out the vote for Obama, including Oprah, Diddy, Sarah Jessica Parker, Matthew Broderick, Edie Falco, John McEnroe, Mary J. Blige, Russell Simmons, Beyonce, and Jay-Z. In the elderly celebrity writer department, Vanity Fair's Dominick Dunne says he postponed surgery so he could vote today. [R&M, Politico]
♦ Ivana Trump has been calling Marius Rusovici, the 23-year-old Belgian she's been hanging out with, "her boyfriend," although it may just be a plot to make Rossano Rubicondi jealous. Or stir up some press. Or both. [NYDN]
♦ David Duchovny and Tea Leoni were spotted holding hands while their kids went trick-or-treating on the Upper East Side last Friday, which may or may not mean they're getting back together. [P6]
♦ Sumner Redstone's ex-wife, Paula Fortunato, is still living in his Beverly Hills mansion. But he may have already reunited with his ex-girlfriend, Manuela Herzer. [P6]