In perhaps the greatest American legal decision since "A Book Named 'John Cleland's Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure' v. Attorney General of Massachusetts," a Pittsburgh court awarded a man $50,000 for flicking off a cop.

"In an interview at the Heritage Foundation, a conservative research group where he is a fellow, Mr. Meese said the 'liberal ideas of extending the power of the state' were to blame for an out-of-control criminal justice system." Ahem.

Thanksgiving Proclamations are, for the most part, pretty routine. Namecheck settlers, Washington, Lincoln, God, and our Troops. Encourage people to give thanks. The end. But there are some key differences between a Bush declaration and an Obama declaration!

It is a good thing the American Constitution calls for instant run-off presidential elections the minute the "winner" dips below 50% approval, or else we would be stuck with the most unpopular president in American history for years to come.

Robert Byrd, our US Senator from the great state of West Virginia, has been a Senator since January 3, 1959, making him the longest-serving member in congressional history. He is 91 years old (his 92nd birthday is on Friday!) and third in line for the presidency should something happen to Obama, Biden, and Pelosi.

White House Counsel Greg Craig resigned. He will be replaced with campaign lawyer Bob Bauer, who is Barack Obama's personal attorney. Politico asserted that he is unqualified and then sought out critics to call him unqualified.

On November 13, 1980 Gabriella Brum won the Miss World Pageant. The next day she resigned.

Tomorrow is Election Day! You will probably not vote, because there are no contested races for anything important in 90% of the nation. But if you are a New Yorker, we have one message: don't vote for Michael Bloomberg.

A grown man who is currently reenacting the Battle of Trenton on Twitter thinks he could be president in 2012.

Want to host the Olympics? So did HITLER. Issuing a statement critical of an insurance industry-funded report on how regulating the health insurance industry would be bad? That is what GOEBBELS did. Welcome to Erick Erickson's brain!

We knew some of the First Lady's ancestors were slaves. But the New York Times' detailed genealogical investigation into precisely who those slaves were brings into moving relief what an astonishing historical earthquake her presence in the White House is.

As we explained in August, Betsy McCaughey is a liar who lies. Incessantly. The magazine that ennabled her lying originally is now, finally calling her out on it.

Hey, before you became outraged about Roman Polanski and maybe before you expressed an opinion on the non-parole of Susan Atkins, were you outraged about the release of the Lockerbie bomber? You are so predictable! And wrong!

Columnist and presidential speechwriter Bill Safire was one of only three non-disloyal Jews President Nixon could name. Here is the speech he drafted for Nixon to read in case the Apollo 11 Astronauts became stranded on the moon!

Susan Atkins died in prison last night at 61. Atkins was sentenced to death in in 1971 for her role in the Tate/LeBianca murders. She was denied parole for the last time on September 2.

Irving Kristol, the godfather of Neoconservatism, is dead at 89. We have him to thank for Reaganomics, the Bush Doctrine, and Bill Kristol.

9/11 Truthers—the actual, self-declared movement Truthers—are, universally and without exception, morons. Van Jones signed a Truther petition, which was incredibly stupid, but he says he is not actually a Truther. Wha...?

On this day eight years ago, four commercial airplanes were hijacked and crashed into buildings and a field. Thousands died. This is the first anniversary of that terrible day, though, that the Terrorists will not still be winning.

Sigh, Mike Dukakis. Sigh. The Boston Globe has joined the chorus of Democrats demanding that the Duke be appointed to Ted Kennedy's Senate seat.

Major league asshole and Kennedy biographer Adam Clymer makes the case that Ted Kennedy's first years in office were not quite as unaccomplished as usually assumed. [NYT]