The other 2013 Elizabeth Taylor biopic aired on British TV last night. Burton & Taylor featured Dominic West and Helena Bonham Carter in the title roles, focused on the twice-divorced couple's reunion on Broadway in 1983's revival of Private Lives, and received generally positive, if unenthusiastic, reviews. That's way more than the widely mocked Lindsay Lohan vehicle, Liz & Dick, which aired earlier this year on Lifetime, could claim.

Is this the Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton you were waiting for? Is this the Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton that you deserve? Or do you just care about the diamond jewelry and leathered tan, respectively, and don't give a damn who is sporting it?

Not satisfied with their first try, the film industry has decided to give it another go at a Liz Taylor biopic.

Harry Potter and The End of the Gravy Train, Part Nine premiered in London today along with most of the British cast, a handful of celebs, and JK Rowling herself. Let's have a look at the festivities, shall we?

Ashton and Demi ignore a chorus of boos in Brazil. Charlie Sheen's rehab center is actually just his house. Glee apologizes to Lindsay Lohan. Helen Bonham Carter praises her own "huge breasts." Tuesday gossip is enhanced with video.

[The delightful Helena Bonham Carter at last night's British Independent Film Awards. Photo via Bauer-Griffin]

Though this two-minute trailer contains many of the same sequences as the first one, today's version is much cleaner and crisper. It also offers a little insight into the plot. It seems that Alice (Mia Wasikowska) is returning to Wonderland to find that the evil Red Queen (Helena Bonham Carter) has taken over and made everything as horrible as a death in the family during Saturday morning cartoons. Now, Alice teams up with Johnny Depp's Mad Hatter (really, did anyone think he wasn't going to kill this role?) to fight for the nice White Queen (Anne Hathaway in Glinda the Good Witch drag, if that's a compliment) and restore the kingdom.

The new Alice in Wonderland trailer was released today, and it looks to be so dreamy, colorful, and imaginative, it's going to be hard to believe you're watching a movie and not frying on acid.

Merrill Lynch's disgraced CEO, John Thain, turns 53 today. Rocker Lenny Kravitz is turning 45. Helena Bonham Carter turns 43. Matt Stone, the co-creator of South Park, is turning 38. Stevie Nicks is 61. Mega-lawyer and Cravath partner Robert D. Joffe is 66. Socialite Annie Churchill is turning 38. Architect Bruce Fowle is 72. Pam Grier (Foxy Brown) turns 60. North Carolina Senator Kay Hagan is turning 56. Comedian "Bobcat" Goldthwait is 47. And Philip Michael Thomas of Miami Vice fame celebrates his 60th birthday today.

• Alex Rodriguez is reportedly negotiating to buy a four-bedroom apartment in 15 Central Park West for "an incredible amount." [NYP]

We've already heard enough stars insisting that those sex scenes we find either major turn-ons (Mickey Rourke force-feeding Kim Basinger strawberries on the kitchen floor in 9 1/2 Weeks) or majorly eye-scarring (Heather Graham faking her way through grainy limo thrusts in Boogie Nights) are totally perfunctory while filming. With the massive crew surrounding them, the sudden lighting checks, and simple fact that they've gotta feign spontaneous heat take after take, we've leaned towards taking their word for it. And as it turns out, no matter how big the star or legendary their prowess in the bedroom, even simple kissing scenes with the most gorgeous A-listers around range from "awkward and sweaty" to "slightly icky and sort of wet." Where Tom Cruise, Angelina Jolie, Harrison Ford, Leonardo DiCaprio and more rank on the list of Worst On-Screen Kissers after the jump.

Sure, they might be successful and talented and, at times, capable of brilliant work, but aren't Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter taking the whole "eccentric artist" look one step too far? There's a difference between looking crazy and looking like a bum from Santa Monica who is bundling up for a long winter's night. One has to wonder if their child will rebel by embracing sports and wearing clothing from Abercrombie & Fitch.

Yes, sadly, it's that time again. Time to stare into the lifeless abyss that is the Swan Dress. But Bjork's legendary snafu has friends! Like Celine Dion's Backwards Suit, Gwyneth Paltrow's Saggy Boob Goth Gown and Corey Feldman's Hammer Pants. All have appeared at one Oscars showdown or another, and all are here for your enjoyment once again.

• Grammy-nominated scary sad trainwreck Amy Winehouse is being questioned in a witness-tampering plot related to her husband's assault trial. [NYP]