Got a non-white person on your Christmas list? Know nothing about him/her other than his/her race? For racist grannies who maybe feel funny about their adopted Chinese grandkids, The New York Times offers a very special "Of Color" gift guide.

Ho ho ho! How can we ruin your Christmas today? I know: a public service campaign that instructs men to purchase pap smears for their special women as holiday gifts.

"New [White House Hannukah] invites went out yesterday with a menorah on them and a note saying, 'Please accept our apologies.'" [Page Six, Previously]

Can still-president George W. Bush continue to wow us with asinine mistakes with a mere two months left in his presidency when he's so clearly checked out already? If his upcoming Hanukkah party is any indication, he's still got it! Attached, his invitation to the White House Hanukkah reception, sent to Jewish leaders across the nation. As you can see, the invite shows a Clydesdale delivering the traditional "Hanukkah Tree" to a White House decorated top to bottom in Hanukkah wreaths. Ha ha ha they just don't care.

Balducci's advertised boneless hams as being "delicious for Chanukah." The grocery store later apologized. And everyone who was offended got gift certificates for a free Yom Kippur brunch! OK, not really. [Serious Eats]

Let's clear up this whole Hanukkah business before more space is wasted in a major daily. (For crissakes, two-year olds are getting drunk on Long Island way before the summer rental season and that shit doesn't report itself!) Helen Kennedy of the NY Daily News tries to wrap her hands around the ball of candle wax that is the sticky mystery of Hanukkah's accepted spelling. Variations offered are:

War on Christmas? Bah, only among retailers. Jews in Israel are more reflective and celebrate the festive Hanukkah season by welcoming Nazis to the Ben Yehuda street mall in Jerusalem.