You know cockney rhyming slang, that stuff that makes Madonna's husband's movies 25% more incomprehensible? We think it's kind of awesome. In fact, we wish Americans walked around saying "Claire Rayners" instead of "trainers" and "Wallace and Gromit" instead of "vomit." Except, what's a Claire Rayners? For that matter, what's a trainers? Okay, we know it means sneakers. But you get our point: Americans need a rhyming slang lexicon of their own. The way you do it, according to this Guardian article, is use the name of a celebrity interchangeably with a random word that rhymes with it. Ex: "I'm going down the pub to grab some Britney Spears." But, you know, less lame than that, and better if the celebrity actually has something to do with the word they're standing in for.
Here are some to get you started:
"I wanted to get really wasted but still remain upright and conscious, so I took some Tara Reid. I know that's really old school, but no one had any coke or Adderall."
"I ate some chili, and all night I was Mischa Barton."
Okay, now you try.

As we speak nervous NBC employees are gathering for a townhall meeting where television head Jeff Zucker a number of them that they're free to pursue other interests and not to let the door hit them on the ass on the way out. While the exact number of fired employees is in some dispute by credulous Times reporters, the general consensus seems to be that 700 people will be let go. England's Guardian, however, sees a much direr situation:

While we always love to see exposé upon exposé of the already over-exposéd skeezy Dov Charney and his American Apparel-branded clothing, we're slightly saddened that this piece in the Guardian falls under the category of "Special Report: United States of America." We don't expect the rest of the world to think fondly of us, but we'd much rather have foreign perception of American fuckitude revolve around the foibles of our Playskool government and not, you know, some random kosher-perv.

The UK's Guardian gets citizen journalism (they got Jeff Jarvis on board, right?) unlike most big media outlets and there's no better way to share, shift, or even abdicate the power of a medium than to ask readers for their snow pictures. Yes, citizen snow pictures.

Iranian journalist and blogger Sina Motallebi has been arrested over "materials in his Web site, including interviews he gave to foreign media." Motallebi, in a Guardian article from October of last year: "There is a lack of freedom of speech in Iran, so Weblogs are a good opportunity, especially for younger people, to explain their views and attitudes, because they can t explain them in any other media. They are a good way to exchange news, so they are a way to freedom and democracy, but it s still very young, less than a year old."
Journalist/blogger arrested in Iran [MSNBC]
Petition: Free Sina Motallebi [Blogalization]
Another journalist and website editor arrested [Reporters without borders]

Not that this has anything to do with anything, but I thought I'd point out this fascinating article in the Guardian about companies that covertly spoof their own brands in order to generate buzz.
Fwd: have you seen this? [Guardian]

The Guardian reports that Soho House London is cracking down on celebrity drug use by searching handbags and monitoring trips to the toilet. In addition, "The...one-year licence for the club requires the renovation of all toilets so flat surfaces are eradicated." [Ed. noteAll flat surfaces? What if people bring their own flat surfaces? Nothing flat allowed at Soho House?] What does this mean for the New York branch? If one can't do a couple of lines of coke in one's own hyper-exclusive private club, then what's the point, really?
Celebrity haunt ordered to clamp down on drugs [Guardian via Greg Lindsay]

The Guardian, exploring commercial weblogs, cites Gawker as an example of the new trend in online media. Gawker, writes the Guardian, is "a blogging mix of upscale party gossip and NYC news."
New biz on the blog [Guardian]

Missed first time round: a profile of the Aussie guys behind Chic Happens, the fashion industry gossip site. These were...