Alex Robinson, resident of the great city of Boston, Massachusetts, discovered a heartwarming message—presumably written by a benevolent former resident—while pulling up floorboards during a renovation of his Charlestown home.

Looks like anyone hoping to see a grown woman battle a 14-year-old 24-year-old in the press will be going home disappointed; Tina Fey has neither the time nor the patience for you to make her nonexistent feud with Taylor Swift "a thing."

Two-and-a-half weeks until the end of Bill Kristol's New York Times contract! What's he up to? UGH.

What we imagine HBO is sending out in response to angry Sopranos-related emails: "They will in no way be lumped together in the 'People with WAYYYYY Too Much Time File,' and promptly deleted. Make no mistake, NOTHING is more important to the financial viability of a major corporation than fans' memories of a show that stopped production about 6 months ago." [This Just In]