The Wall Street Journal's news content is the equal of any newspaper in America. The Wall Street Journal's op-ed page is a den of right wing groupthink and delusion unsurpassed in its potential to embarrass the non-lunatics at the paper.

Man-made climate change happens. Man-made climate change kills a lot of people. It's going to kill a lot more. We have laws on the books to punish anyone whose lies contribute to people's deaths. It's time to punish the climate-change liars.

In 2013, there were 10,885 published, peer-reviewed articles that researched anthropogenic, or man-made, climate change. Only two argued that the phenomenon wasn't real, according to the geochemist who compiled them.

Worrying about global warming can be exhausting. What should we do? Recycle? Plant a garden? It's confusing. So it's good to hear a respected scientist say: Relax. We're already completely fucked no matter what.

Even coming from tabloid gutter cleaner Andrea Peyser, the "It's cold so global warming is a lie" column still has the power to take your breath away, with stupidity. What, no minorities to shriek at today, Andrea?

You care about the environment, eh? You want to stop global warming? You support switching cars and trucks and buses to "clean burning natural gas?" Wrong! Our best-laid plans only hasten our demise.

It seems there's a bit of inclement weather on the East Coast, and also around the Great Lakes and the Midwest and (who knows?) maybe even Texas and the South. Please enjoy your blizzards and Winter Wonderland, because snow and cold are beautiful things, and one day you can tell your starving children living underground what it was like to go outside on a crisp winter's day.

On this New Year's Day in America, 2014, the nation's typists ("thought leaders") are required to use their long-dormant psychic abilities to designate the next 12 months as the Year of Something or Other, whether that be "accidental mass suicide" or "wearable automobiles" or "raccoon-sized talking spiders." Such predictions will generally be wrong, yet there is also the remote possibility that the simple act of making a prediction will cause it to happen, no matter how ridiculous or vile.

The scientific consensus about what will happen to billions of humans over the next century as climate change intensifies: "We'll die."

In America in 2013, a news story on a new record cold temperature in Antarctica (-135.8!) finds it necessary to include this explanation from a prominent scientist: "Just because one spot on Earth has set records for cold that has little to do with global warming because it is one spot in one place." Jesus we're dumb.

Did you know those tasty little Northern Shrimp can live for five years? That's kindergarten age! Anyway, you'll be eating a lot less Maine shrimp next year, because the fishery collapsed due to warming oceans. No more Maine shrimp.

If you love excitement, you're going to love these last years of your life. Civil war, food riots, monster storms and a lot more apocalyptic religious extremism will spice up even the dullest and most comfortable existence, according to a new United Nations report on the now-constant insanity we boringly call "climate change." But even the weather seems to be capitalist, because the demons of global warming most enjoy hurting the poor.

Barring a huge public works project the likes of which the world has never seen, south Florida is doomed. Its end will come not from Bugs Bunny wielding a saw, but from the gentle lapping of waves higher and higher upon the shore. Three points to ponder:

The monstrous storm seen in this new satellite image is the biggest of the year and one of the most powerful tropical cyclones of all time. "Super typhoon" Haiyan is currently thrashing the entirety of the Philippines with sustained winds of 190 mph and gusts up to 230 mph, and then it's headed for Vietnam. It's such a wildly dangerous storm that it's even terrifying the weather forecasters.

Moose are dying off across North America—and no one knows why.

Global warming could cause your tuna fish to fill up with with (even more) mercury.

If the grim news about our slow-cooking world has got you down, you might be an environmentalist. Recycling bins, hiking boots, and that reusable grocery bag you got at the farmer's market are other signs that you may have ecological beliefs and concerns. To the industrial propagandists, even your awareness of the hotter temperatures and horrific storms is proof that your green behavior is actually a religion. So what would happen if 10 million or 50 million religious environmentalists suddenly appeared on the national scene?

People are strangers out here on the oil patch, and public conversation is terse and muted. You never know when an oil company manager or safety inspector or corporate spy is sniffing around. I learned after the first day in Williston, N.D., that my usual work uniform of an old sports coat and tie made me suspect. Leaving the tie at the motel helped, but not much.

There has been a growing movement of late to push colleges and universities to get rid of all their investments in fossil fuels, in the same way they were pushed to divest from holdings in apartheid South Africa a generation ago. Harvard has answered: no thx.

You thought the killer tornadoes recently were bad? "You ain't seen nothing yet!" scientists say, sucking their teeth and letting out a low whistle.