BREAKING! We hear that Camille, that flower-behind-the-ear-having intern at Black Book who was spotted on the subway by Patrick Moberg and later located via the internet, isn't as into him as he is into her.

The passive-aggressive emo subway-stalking routine has reached a tipping point, with copycat bloggers blooming like pansies. We would like to offer some helpful hints to participants in and victims of this phenomenon.