Ad Week compiled a list of America's most-shoplifted retail goods, and it reads like a bad date with a guy who says "bro" a lot: Axe body spray, filet mignon, Jameson, Gillette Mach 4 razors, and Polo Ralph Lauren shirts.

Ever since The Onion's faux-editorial "Fuck Everything, We're Doing Five Blades" came true in real life, it's been clear that the razor industry would just keep adding blades until it was forced to stop. That time has come.

Not that it was hard to see this coming, but The Business That Is Tiger Woods is starting to lose a grip on its multinational corporate backers. In fact, one two of them have gone down! Can you guess who?

If more dudes shaved their balls, that's like, thousands more razors they can sell every year. Every little bit helps. [via Adfreak]