Simon & Schuster is publishing a book titled O: A Presidential Novel this month, by "Anonymous" — supposedly someone with "vast" insider knowledge of the Obama presidency. Will this be the next Primary Colors? Sure! Unless it's a hoax. [via]

Hide your children! Lock your doors! Lindsay Lohan is free again. Her court-ordered treatment for alcoholism ended today, and—despite early rumors to the contrary—she has been released. No word where she went or what she'll do next.

Did Rudy Giuliani, Tom Ridge, John Bolton, and a bunch of other neocons really attend a rally in support of a communist Saddam Hussein-loving terrorist organization last month? Yes! Is that really a crime? Yes!

Mila Kunis faces an onslaught of obnoxious break-up rumors. David Arquette goes to rehab. Lindsay Lohan's court-ordered rehab ends. (And her freely chosen rehab begins.) Bieber and Selena make out on a yacht. Monday gossip abandons auld acquaintances.

California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger took up the time-honored tradition of hooking up friends on the way out of office by reducing the prison term of political ally Fabian Nuñez's son, Esteban, who participated in the murder of a college student.

[David Hasselhoff and his motley crew storm Australia's Bondi Beach as the former "Baywatch" star peddles some sort of consumer product there. Image via Getty]

Actress Mila Kunis and The Pagemaster star Macaulay Culkin have "amicably" broken up after a seven-year relationship. Guess he'll be "home alone" a lot more often, am I right? "My Girl"—more like "bye, girl"! And so on.

The Air Force has a fancy new camera technology, called "Gorgon Stare," which can "transmit live video images of physical movement across an entire town." Too bad it's basically useless!

Actor David Arquette checked into rehab for "alcohol and other issues" on New Year's Day, according to TMZ. This is probably his best shot at getting his estranged wife Courteney Cox back. That, and, maybe, dressing like a normal person.

Good news from the Snowpocalypse: A man survived a suicide attempt today when he jumped from the 9th floor of a Midtown Manhattan building and landed on a pile of garbage that was left uncollected after the snowstorm. [NYDN]

The Oprah Winfrey Network launched yesterday. New York Times television critic Alessandra Stanley calls it "a place where cynicism takes a holiday and mockery hasn't yet been invented." This will not stand.

[Participants in the annual New Year's Day Polar Bear Plunge at Coney Island run into the ocean. Click through for another picture of very cold people. Image via Getty]

Speculation is heating up again that Facebook might go public next year. Or what if Groupon AND Facebook IPO'd at the same time? Would all the money in the universe be sucked into the resulting black hole?

A group of men dressed like Vikings lead the torchlight procession that kicks off Edinburgh New Year's celebration. Kind of makes the Times Square ball drop look a little wimpy, no? Image via Getty]

[People walk through the Smithsonian's National Zoo in Washington, D.C. Image via Getty]

After Venezuela revoked the visa of proposed American envoy Larry Palmer, the U.S. has responded by revoking the visa of Venezuelan ambassador Bernardo Alvarez Herrera. Is it just me, or are Venezuela and the U.S. totally flirting?

The city medical examiner has determined that designer Sylvie Cachay, found dead earlier this month at Manhattan's posh Soho Hotel, was strangled and drowned to death. Her boyfriend Nicholas Brooks has been charged with attempted murder in the case.

Snooki planned on dropping in a glass ball in Times Square on New Year's Eve like a 'friggen hamster.' Unfortunately it looks like she's been banned from Times Square, the potential site of the MTV-backed stunt. Save your ball jokes.

The Feds are coming down hard on ol' Christine O'Donnell, the failed Delaware Senate candidate. The FBI has allegedly opened a criminal probe into the dingbat witch over whether she used campaign funds for personal expenses. Why so sexist, FBI?

George Clooney is financing the use of surveillance satellites to monitor violence in the Sudan in advance of an independence referendum there. He calls himself the "anti-genocide paparazzi."