Courtney Love turns 45 today. Tom Hanks is turning 53. Jack White is 34. Jimmy Smits is 54. Floyd Abrams, the famed First Amendment attorney (and father of Dan), turns 73. Author/neurologist Oliver Sacks is turning 76. Former defense secretary Donald Rumsfeld is 77. ACLU honcho Anthony Romero is 44. AIDS activist Mathilde Krim is turning 83. Architect Michael Graves turns75. Actor Chris Cooper is 58. Netscape co-founder Marc Andreessen turns 38. Author Dean Koontz is 64. Fred Savage of Wonder Years fame turns 33. Actress Kelly McGillis is 52. And OJ Simpson is celebrating his 62nd birthday behind bars today.

Hollywood PrivacyWatch: 12/6 — I was at the Griddle on Sunset on Saturday morning and got seated next to FRED SAVAGE. He was sitting with a super-skinny girl who had two oversized pancakes on her plate while he was eating a tiny salad. Probably appropriately so, as he's packed on a few pounds since the days of kissing Winnie. Was talking super-loud about a new comedy project he's involved with and taking notes on a notepad. He seemed sweet. When he saw me eyeing the woman's pancakes, he said I should bypass my order and eat her leftovers instead. I passed. [Hollywood PrivacyWatch is written by and for Defamer readers; send your sightings to tips@defamer.com.]

There is no point fighting it anymore. Vh1 will continue to produce shows featuring has-been stars from our youth and, like moths to the TV screen, we'll watch them cry, urinate on themselves and make out in hot tubs until the end of time. Their newest idea will feature (shocker!) Vh1 reality vet Scott Baio mentoring eight “male teen idols” of the 80s in an effort to jump-start a comeback. Since the sad little group has yet to be revealed, we went ahead and picked two former crushworthy picks we’d most like to see week after week, and the two who might force us to cancel our cable package altogether:

While their toe-tapping take on "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" was an indisputable hit with onlookers, nothing compared to the moment a solemn Kevin Arnold donned a white robe and angel wings, mounted a barricade made of discarded picket-signs, and belted to the tune of "O Holy Night," "No more we write/Nick Counter is a Wiener!" in his stirring, pitch-perfect mezzo-soprano.

· If Harrison Ford can avoid breaking a hip, we might yet get to see him play Indy one more time: "Yeah, sometimes I find myself getting into stunt pads and preparing to roll down a flight of stairs and wrestle some 26-year-old stunt man across the floor and think, 'What the [bleep] am I doing?' But, you know, it feels so good to do it, so I'll only stop when it really hurts."
· If this report about Britney Spears wanting to have another baby to strengthen her marriage is true (and that's a pretty big "if"), then we clearly haven't given her enough credit for knowing what she's doing with her life.
· Yes, now that you bring it up, we have been curious about what's been going on with Fred Savage's acting career!
· As it turns out, maybe Nellie McKay wasn't just screwing around when she went off on Sony a month ago.
· We had no idea that there were still any Planet Hollywoods, anywhere, but apparently the one in Toronto is shutting down for good.