On Tuesday, following a rally at SUNY-Purchase, Greenpeace activist Eva Resnick-Day confronted Hillary Clinton, asking her whether she would stop taking money from the fossil fuel industry. Clinton, frustrated, jabbed her finger in Resnick-Day’s face: “I am so sick of the Sanders campaign lying about me.”

Hey! We’ve got some not bad news here! Not bad news! Here!

While you slackers were all spending quality time with your families, the global oil markets were plummeting! This is good news, perhaps. Or maybe bad news? Let's explore how this will save—or possibly destroy—our world.