Two tour buses belonging to the bands Foreigner and Styx caught fire Wednesday in a Philadelphia parking lot in an urgent, urgent emergency that threatened to engulf the entirety of the years 1977 to 1984.

That headline, quite possibly the best ever written, from About.com, which also reminds us: "AARP members who are also Foreigner fans would have had to have been (as young as) 19 or 20 when the band first emerged."