If you hadn't noticed, I got married and went on a honeymoon. Did you miss me? Apparently so. Gizmodo gets banned from CES. Golson asks Calacanis for a job. Our very special correspondent pickets against the new pay system. Where was Denton with the "too insidery" warnings? Oh that's right, blogging for Gawker. Here's what really happened during the first two weeks of 2008, according to a speed-read of my feeds. On my next honeymoon, I'm bringing a laptop.

If this year's "Sexiest Man Alive" issue of People left you wanting—sure, few of us would argue with their choice of sexiestest man Matt Damon, but the Shemar Moore-caliber also-rans were frequently lacking—we direct you instead to Salon.com's Sexiest Man Living 2007. Bringing together 26 of the hunkiest guys for the thinking woman and Gay, their list recognizes the pasty, the paunchy, the bespectacled (Ira Glass, Judd Apatow, 2007 Alec Baldwin, etc.) celebrities that send their editors into a sexy-man lather.

· This is what you're missing out on if you ever make the mistake of changing the channel from QVC.
· Even in Bali, Mel Gibson can't get "sweaty" and "bleary-eyed" without somebody sticking a camera in his face. Will this man never know peace?
· Who could've guessed that astronomers would be Star Trek fans?
· It appears that Pam Anderson's relationship progressed at least as far as the drunken-marriage-license-filing stage.
· The Flight of the Concords on the best part of fame: "Jemaine went to the Viper Room the other night, got to the door and the woman said, '$10, please.' Then somebody turns to her [mimes whispering] and she goes, '$5, please.' That's my favorite experience. Not free, but celebrity discount—half-off entrance to a club."
· We knew we'd seen that Spector look somewhere before.

Bad news today for fans of foul-mouthed patriarchs of dysfunctional surfing dynastys who suddenly find themselves periodically levitating upon the arrival of a simple, Christlike drifter in their lives: HBO has canceled John from Cincinnati, the network's baffling first attempt at filling the void left by The Sopranos. Devotees of series creator David Milch will be happy to learn that HBO is trying to extend its development deal with the writer, whom they hope will have more luck transplanting the relentless, operatic profanity of previous hit Deadwood to another series, possibly one set in a group home for sufferers of Tourette's Syndrome.