Does anyone have a solution for America's "Arizona problem"? The once-peaceful cactus colony is now an embarrassment to a nation that has many, but nothing quite like this. It really should've been obvious for years: When you move billions of elderly white people to an area with a large minority population and then take away everyone's money and houses in an overnight market collapse, everyone gets all worked up, and they all have guns, and the legislature responds by crapping out strange, violent pieces of legislation that should only appeal to dogs but get a decent reception among delirious broke people, too. And then someone shoots a member of Congress, which may or may not have anything to do with anything.

A reporter and a cameraperson from a California FOX affiliate were attacked and beaten when they tried to question a group of people who had gathered in a Sacramento IHOP parking lot to mourn the shooting death of a 27 year-old man in the same parking lot yesterday. The whole thing was caught on tape! Watching it is a good way to make yourself feel dirty without being able to quite put your finger on why. [Fox40]

Wasp wands! Greenhouse gases! Ecological disaster! Pill mills! HIV photography! Mind driving! Baby blaming! Bone marrow prices! And the lions of the sea, revealed! It's your Monday Science Watch, where we watch science—for the time being!

American government officials now say that Raymond Davis, the American man arrested in Pakistan last month after shooting two men dead in Lahore, was part of a covert, C.I.A.-led team of operatives, according to The New York Times.

In 1970, an unknown thief picked Rudolph Resta's wallet from the pocket of his coat, which was hanging in a closet at the New York Times building. Forty years later, a security guard found the wallet hidden in a hole in a wall. After a series of magical coincidences, an NYT reporter tracked down Resta, gave the wallet back to him, and turned the whole affair into a charming story for NYT's City Room blog.

There's not exactly a surplus of news cameras in Libya right now, so plenty of reports are flying around and it's not clear which of them are true. But we can say with enough confidence that it's absolute hell over there. Muammar Qaddafi is pulling out every nasty little trick to protect his regime, assuming he's even in the country. It could always be that smarmy kid of his doing the unconscionable.

Here's a trailer for the indie film Hesher, starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt as a man with a partial shirt allergy, and Natalie Portman as his big-spectacled potential love interest. Gordon-Levitt's character, Hesher, stumbles into the life of a lonely little boy with a depressed father (Rainn Wilson) and a daffy grandma. It's not entirely clear who Portman's character is, but we do know that she wears ugly glasses!

Behold: A rare sighting of John Travolta without his wig. In Hawaii celebrating his 57th birthday with wife Kelly Preston, Travolta sat on a swing and allowed the sea breeze to sweep through the small amount of hair he has left.

Frank Bailey is a former confidante to Sarah Palin. He started off painting her gubernatorial campaign offices as a volunteer in 2005 and left as a top aide in 2009. He was inspired by, loyal to, and probably in love with Palin, based on our reading. But now he hates her! All of this according to his 465-page, tell-all manuscript that's mysteriously leaked to reporters' inboxes everywhere.

Are you a 25-to-34-year-old male who prefers regular Dr Pepper, but wants fewer calories—and also knows that Diet Dr. Pepper is for queers? Allow us to introduce you to Dr Pepper Ten: ten masculine calories, made outta balls.

It turns out Jennifer Aniston isn't completely unlovable, because living Abercrombie polo Ashton Kutcher wants to go out on a date with her. Kutcher was on the BBC this weekend talking about how he wants a date with the perpetually single Aniston to win a $1,000 bet he made with a friend in college, and he's not letting his wife, Demi Moore, get in the way either.

In what could be viewed as a vote of no confidence in director/creator Julie Taymor's ability to fix Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark, the producers of the creatively flailing Broadway musical (which is certainly not financially flailing) are bringing in a co-director to gently tap Taymor on the shoulder and send her back to the dugout for a bit.

In order to keep her role, this co-star in the Vampire flicks had to give up her baby. This couple broke up because of Facebook, and this famous lady wishes she had an abortion rather than a child with her no-good mate.

Over the last several years, Libya has transformed itself from regional pariah into a country where foreign leaders are begging to pose for a grip-and-grin with Brother Leader Muammar el-Qaddafi. How did this happen?

Gorillas are so much like us! Not in the sense that they're magical creatures filled with empathy and understanding or whatever; in the sense that the ones who live in the U.S. are fat-asses dying of heart disease who love to throw up eat their own vomit in order "to taste sugar again and again." Really! Heart disease is the number-one killer among the type of gorillas that live in the U.S., and zoo gorillas really do barf up their meals and eat them again, apparently four times an hour on average—even though their diet consists entirely of totally delicious-looking, definitely healthy and not-at-all gross red vitamin biscuits!

Looking for a way to show your support for both pizza and the cause of Wisconsin unions, currently engaged in protests against the state's Republican Governor Scott Walker and his anti-union budget bill? Try calling Ian's, a "campus staple" pizza joint in Madison, which has given away thousands of slices of "donated" pizza to protestors, all bought and paid for by people calling in to the restaurant from around the world. No, really, around the world:

Let's check in on America's public school systems and see how we're preparing our youth of today for the challenges of tomorrow! In Fairfax County, Va., The Washington Post reports, a 15-year-old "model student" and linebacker, Nick Stuban, was suspended and banned from school property for seven weeks for buying a capsule of the legal "marijuana-like" synthetic compound JWH-108. He was then reassigned to a different high school; a month later, he killed himself.

Two girls were hurt in Arizona over the weekend when the inflatable castle in which they were bouncing was carried away by a sudden gust of wind and deposited on the roof of a neighbor's house. One of the girls is still in the emergency room with serious head injuries, apparently in "serious but stable condition"; the other seems to have escaped with only minor injuries. In the future, please, remember to properly secure your enormous air-filled castle; but remember that wind is not the only danger threatening your bounce house-occupying children: Last year, California's attorney general filed a lawsuit over high levels of lead in bounce-house vinyl. [ABC15; KOLD; stock image via Shutterstock]

Above is a picture of Democratic Oregon representative David Wu wearing a fuzzy tiger costume uncovered by the Portland alt-weekly Wilamette Week. Wu sent the picture to some staffers from his official Blackberry early on a Saturday morning last October, which raises some questions.

The Vatican has issued a statement in response to travel agencies trying to sell tickets to the May 1 beatification of Pope John Paul II, because there are no actual tickets for the event. From Vatican Radio: