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Michigan Congressman Denies Molesting Cousin 50 Years Ago

Seth Abramovitch · 11/20/11 09:36PM

Michigan Democratic Rep. Dale Kildee, 82, has issued a strongly worded denial of accusations made by the mother of a male cousin, who says her son was sexually abused by the longtime congressman 50 years ago.

Latest Terror Suspect Is a Loner Who Lives With His Mom

Lauri Apple · 11/20/11 08:28PM

Say hello to Jose Pimentel! Jose, 27, pictured at right, lives in New York City with his mom, enjoys the Internet, and—according to "his friends" (the mainstream media)—is a "loner." Oh, and he was just arrested for allegedly making pipe bombs for terroristic purposes.

Police Barricades Protect NYC Mayor From '24-Hour' Drum Circle

Lauri Apple · 11/20/11 07:40PM

The Occupy Wall Street protesters who had planned to throw a 24-hour drum circle party (a violation of several United Nations human rights treaties) outside NYC Mayor Mike Bloomberg's Manhattan manse didn't quite make it thanks to NYPD officers and barricades. Undaunted, they held their percussive party down the street. A sax player and a cowbell armada showed up to provide ... well, not rhythms. How about sounds? Yes, sounds.

Petty Hot Dog Thief to Spend 80 Years in Prison

Lauri Apple · 11/20/11 06:32PM

Back in 2009, Charles Cleveland Nowden was busted at a Fort Worth movie theater for trying to purchase a lethal junk-food combo meal—two hot dogs, two cokes, and popcorn—with a counterfeit $20. This week, he received an 80-year prison sentence. Fort Worth's snack community is safe again!

Delightful NASCAR Fans Boo Michelle Obama

Max Read · 11/20/11 04:28PM

First Lady Michelle Obama was a NASCAR Grand Marshal at today's Ford 400 (so was her sidekick, Second Lady Jill Biden), so she naturally received a warm welcome from patriotic NASCAR fans. Kidding! She got booed.

School Uses Russell Brand's Smutty Phone Calls to Teach Kids

Lauri Apple · 11/20/11 04:24PM

Upon realizing the pedogogical potential of Russell Brand's dirty prank calls, the headmaster of a hoity-toity north London school incorporated them into an English exam that was then administered to 14-year-old students. Now he doesn't understand why are some of the kids' parents are so upset about this.

America's Great Wall Is a Mound of Tires in South Carolina

Max Read · 11/20/11 02:12PM

The Great Wall of China has long been said to be the only man-made structure visible from space. Well, guess what, commies? America's got its own space-visible man-made structure: a mound of discarded tires in Calhoun County, South Carolina.

UC Davis Students' Eerie, Powerful Protest Against Pepper-Spray Chancellor

Max Read · 11/20/11 11:01AM

After video of UC Davis police officer Lt. John Pike's shockingly nonchalant use of pepper spray against peaceful, passive protestors went viral yesterday, chancellor Linda Katehi scheduled a press conference for the afternoon. Students were refused entry and began to chant and protest outside the building; Katehi refused to leave for three hours, because "the crowd outside was perceived to be hostile." It was. But it wasn't violent: Here's Katehi leaving the building, finally, after the sun had set, given a wide berth by the hundreds of students who had gathered there, each of them staring on in silence. It's as creepy as it is moving. [The Second Alarm]

How Egypt Justifies Its Brutal Crackdown: Occupy Wall Street

Max Read · 11/20/11 09:58AM

Two people were killed in Cairo and Alexandria this weekend as Egyptian activists took the streets to protest the military's attempts to maintain its grip on power. And guess how the state is justifying its deadly crackdown.

The Woman Who Fed Squirrels Too Much

Lauri Apple · 11/19/11 08:17PM

Annick Richardson not only feeds peanuts to the squirrels who frolic about on her yard, but also allegedly enters her neighbors' properties to feed their squirrels as well. This is how she ended up being charged with two counts of criminal trespassing.

20-Year-Old Ad Reveals That Obama's Voice Used to Be Sexier

Lauri Apple · 11/19/11 04:04PM

In 1991, when he was commander-in-chief of the Harvard Law Review, then-twentysomething President Barack Obama made this ad about 20th century lawyer Charles Hamilton Houston for TBS's "Black History Minute." The video shows a less-polished, deeper-voiced Obama, before he acquired years of public-speaking experience and quit the smokey treats.

Hospital Really Sorry About Injecting Man With Execution Drug

Lauri Apple · 11/19/11 03:04PM

In July 2010, 79-year-old Florida man Richard Smith went to the hospital complaining about breathing troubles and stomach pains. After his nurse accidentally injected him with Pancuronium—a drug that's given to death row inmates during the execution process—Smith's health troubles were gone. But so was he, eventually.

Demi's Bisexual 'Needs' Led to Relationship-Destroying Open Marriage

Max Read · 11/19/11 01:28PM

Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher had an open marriage—because Moore "didn't always get all she needed from Ashton." Prince Harry parties it up in Las Vegas. And Kris Humphries has a sad. Saturday's gossip is also in an open marriage with Ashton. Very open.