This should end well. Unhappy with her current weight, 42-year-old mother Donna Simpson is determined to hit an even 1,000 pounds. And she's "put herself on the Internet where people can pay to watch her eat." [NYP]

Have you noticed that Al Sharpton's been looking a little slimmer in recent weeks? Why, yes, he has. Al says he's dropped 20 pounds in the past six months thanks to a new exercise regime—four days a week on the treadmill and elliptical—and an "almost starvation-style" diet. "He eats only two meals daily, both before 6 p.m. His breakfast is two hard-boiled eggs and tomato, and his other meal is fish accompanied by a green salad. One day a week, just to mix it up, he throws some chicken on that salad." We'll bet donuts to dollars that if he can keep it up, an Al Sharpton weight loss book will be on bookstore shelves by 2010.

Model-turned "wellness expert" and "spiritual counselor" Kathy Freston credits yoga and veganism with helping her gain self confidence, quit smoking, and find her soulmate—who just so happens to be exceedingly rich former CEO of Viacom, Tom Freston. She's been peddling her self-help books to socialites on the Upper East Side for years, although she now appears to have bagged her biggest convert yet—Oprah! The daytime queen is on week two of Freston's 21-day cleanse, and she even started a blog about her experience. No meat, no sugar, no gluten, no alcohol, no caffeine—21 days has probably never seemed so long. A video of Oprah admiring a falafel ball after the jump.