A metropolis of roaches living inside a cat food bag, noticed only when an accidental kick to the bag sent them flooding out. Fearless cockroaches charging toward you in your own bedroom. Bugs in the pillowcase, bugs in the coffee pot, bugs in your ear. Bugs during sex. Stop reading if you want to sleep soundly tonight. These are Gawker reader’s most skin-crawling cockroach encounters.

When Portland's Don Derfler looked out his window and saw the mailman lingering in his neighbor's yard, "I thought he had a bunch of packages for us." Oh, yes, he did. Derfler continues:

Contents of a disgusting suitcase confiscated at D.C.'s Dulles airport: Elephant tails, dried chameleons, bloody sheets, chicken blood, dirt, feathers, and a dried hedgehog. The man carrying the suitcase said it was for "spiritual purposes." [Examiner]

We declare the infamous hipster loft building at 255 McKibbin Street to be an official no-go zone. Over on the building's MySpace—the building has a MySpace!—the tales of bedbug woe throughout the building are pouring in. It is time to fully quarantine the area. Put up the barbed wire and the guard towers!
BEDBUGS are a MAJOR ISSUE!!! [248 McKibbin MySpace]

They started dating last summer, and broke up this May. And now we hear that residents of John Mayer's building were treated to the sight of Jessica Simpson taking a morning ride of shame down the elevator this weekend. Whoa! Is this John Mayer's I'm-turning-30-next-month freak-out? Is this Jessica Simpson's latest manifestation of self-hatred? Is she going to get all chunky and brunette again? Why won't someone keep them from rekindling this terribly annoying liaison?

"The number of higher-income families having three or more kids has increased by 30 percent in the past 10 years." And! "'We are compelled to be successful and to be achievers,' says [Annette Madden-Kline, a mom of two kids who didn't know she needed more until she moved to posh Darien, Conn.] 'And if you are an Ivy League graduate, who's always balanced all of the things in your life and done it well, you don't decide to be a mom and have one kid.' Right. Got that? Having one kid is weak. It's for community college graduates." [Broadsheet]