· Indeed, a puppy is a terrible Christmas present. Every animal lover knows that sheep are much more docile while being sodomized during the holidays.
· There's probably some Photoshop chicanery at play here, but just in case, here's a link to Eliza Dushku's alleged upstaging of a year's worth of nipple slips.
· We bet you've been unable to sleep for weeks, tormented by your ignorance of Woody Allen's feelings about London's weather or the status of Rivers Cuomo's celibacy pledge. Finally, closure!
· Soon-to-be celebrity footnote Nick Lachey's not going down without a fight.