Like so many teenage girls before me, I decided to read the Twilight books. Was it the series of insane interviews from Mormon author Stephenie Meyer that convinced me? Was it the recent news that Twilight screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg will adapt for the screen the next two books in the series, New Moon and Eclipse? Was it because of Entertainment Weekly's obsession with the film? Was it the recent report that kids are asking the film's vampiric star Robert Pattinson to bite them? All of the above qualify in part, but really, I just wanted to see if a vampire romance with little to no sex could captivate someone squarely outside of the book's desired audience. My startling conclusion after the jump.As you no doubt already know by now, the basic plot of Twilight is incredibly simple, and that's why it works. Girl meets vampire, falls in love with vampire...and meditatively observes vampire's ornate good looks from across the cab of her dilapidated red truck for next 300 pages. As the romance evolves over the course of the series (and I'm in the middle of the third one, Eclipse, now), Meyer is forced to separate the two characters fairly often, partly to create more tension, and partly to prevent us from asking why exactly no one is throwing on a little Marvin Gaye.