In case there was any lingering confusion about whether or not Paris Hilton did or did not offer a tearful plea on behalf of the plight of India's pale-ale-addicted elephants, the celebrity heiress appeared on The Ellen DeGeneres Show today to dispel that rumor, and another involving an interest in cryogenics.

Like a fine, snout-sprayed cognac mist, Paris Hilton's plea on behalf of drunken elephants appears to have evaporated into thin air, as the AP has issued the following kill-order on the story: "AP-KILL ADVISORY Stations: The separate slugged Hilton-Drunk Elephants sent as V3374 at 12:17 p.m. Eastern time has been KILLED. Lori Berk, a publicist for Hilton, says she never made any comments about helping drunken elephants in India. A kill is mandatory. Make certain the item is not aired. No sub will be filed. AP Broadcast News Center - Washington."